Battle of Grendon

Ye martial gods of ancient date
Grant me assistance to relate
A battle, such as ne'er before
Was witnessed in the days of yore

'Twas on a summer's eve there stood
Upon a bridge that crossed a flood
Dark Groups of wild mysterious forms
Like thunder clouds portending storms

With gloomy looks and frowning brows
They muttered forth vengeful vows
Ill omens these for on that night
Was brewing a disastrous fight

(In this famous Grendon Brook
Moonrakers used for cheese to look)
Now this is how the war arose
Which lead to such disastrous blows:-

A certain person nursed a spite
Against his neighbour named Wright
And feeling wronged he vowed that day
That he would conquer in the fray

The brook was blocked and that was why
He would the dam forthwith destroy
So with his men the following morn
He took his way at early dawn

But there was placed to guard the post
A rather formidable host
Who sat at ease and feared no foe
But thought it was a merry go

They smiled and did themselves regale
With sundry pints of good old ale
Soon as they saw the foe appear
They gave a hearty ringing cheer

Some words of warning they addressed
But all in vain for onward pressed
John Spencer who with shouts replied
Goliath-like he all defied

Then leaping forward with his axe
He on the dam made fierce attacks
But little thought how sad a fate
Did on his first attmept await

Wright's men dashed o'er the warrior took
And hurled him headlong in the brook
Then as he struggling gained the shore
They seized and soused him in once more

(I should not wonder if he swore!)
But Spencer is a man of pluck
And did not relish such a duck
He sraightway seized his trusty spud

And gave to one a heavy thud
At once the battle fiercely raged
And ev'ry man was now engaged
Strong villagers of humble name

Though valiant men unknown to name
Brave Ward and Bates and Eden bold
And many other young and old
Both sides did make a gallant stand

And fought with all that came to hand
With crowbar or with wooden stake
Axe spade and muderous iron stake
Rage seemed to animate each soul

Their passions were beyond control
So fiercely fought these warriors bold
That much they did remains untold
It was indeed a mighty fray

So furiously they hacked away
Young Shadrach seized a well worn spade
And hastened to his father's aid
But on his heead there came a thwack

That laid him prostrate on his back
"My son is killed" J Spencer cried
"And serves him right" one soon replied
But as the youngster never stirred

They sent forthwith for Dr Bird
To Bozeat too sent some besides
An army surgeon there resides
These active doctors did their best

And on the field the victims drest
The battle ceased for with alarm
Each saw that he had done much harm
The news spread fast o'er the hills and dales

And even reached to distant Wales
Police arrived in great dismay
And viewed the carnage of the day
Each one looked blue and shook his head

For blood had been most freely shed
And then to show they were displeased
They ev'ry mortal weapon seized
Each warrior now the fight was o'er

Limped off in haste downcast and sore
Yea many a one shall long bewail
The subject of this tragic tale