Page:Artabanzanus (Ferrar, 1896).djvu/113

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DOCTOR JULIUS
105

your faithful services, but really you must spare me now; your extraordinary eloquence is too overpowering. Give me a cordial at once, or I shall faint away on the spot, if I don't die altogether.'

'With pleasure, my lord, and with many apologies for not having offered you one before. What say you to a glass of my great revivifying antiarthritic taxacorum puffinalis?'

'No objection, Doctor, so long as it is not your cursed taxacorum squeezatalis, which you administer to my daughter Bellagranda so often.'

When the Demon had quaffed the effervescing cordial which the Doctor set before him, he prepared to depart, saying:

'I'll think about what you have said touching the holiday, Doctor, and will endeavour, as a particular friend of yours, to make it possible, but I am afraid you cannot be spared just now, the hospitals are full.'

'I can discharge a hundred thousand patients to-morrow morning, sir,' said the Doctor.

'And who will undertake your duties while you're away working for me above ground?'

'My Assistant Inspector, sir—Doctor Horatio Mancus, a careful and clever man.'

'Well, I shall not say "no" at present,' said the Demon with a dubious cough and a chuckle; 'but mind, my clever friend, I have not said "yes" yet,' and he stalked out of the room with the air of a conquering hero.

'Now, General Astoragus,' said the Doctor, seizing that hopeful gentleman by the collar, 'now for you, my boy—were you ever boiled before in rattlesnake's poison and rackarock, eh? are you ready for that interesting experiment in chemistry, eh? If you have howls prepare to howl them now! See the Bard of Avon, who is responsible for everything nowadays. Come along, sir.'