Page:Madame Rolland (Blind 1886).djvu/223

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LOVE IN A PRISON.
213

that you can ensure my safety, nor do I care for safety at its cost; but shall die contentedly if I know that you are of use to your country. Death, sorrow, torments are nothing to me, I can defy them; believe me, I shall live to my last hour without wasting an instant in ignoble fears. . . .

"Certain privileges, due to my humane keepers, I am forced to keep secret for fear of compromising them; but kind actions are more binding than chains, and supposing I could save myself to-morrow, I would not, for fear of ruining the honest gaoler who does his best to soften my captivity. . . . I have my Thomson (dear to me on more accounts than one), Shaftesbury, an English dictionary, Tacitus, and Plutarch; I lead the same life as in my study at home, at the Ministerial dwelling, or elsewhere, . . . I have prevented R—— from addressing himself to the Convention since the 2nd of June. It is no longer the National Assembly to persons of high principles. I know of no constituted authority now in Paris from which I should care to solicit anything; I would prefer rotting in my chains to such humiliation. The tyrants may oppress, but degrade me? never, never! . . . The unfortunate R—— has been in hiding with several timorous friends within the last twenty days, screened from all eyes—more of a captive than I. I am anxious about the state of his head and health; he is now in your neighbourhood—ah! would he were so morally speaking. I hardly dare tell you, what you only will understand, that I was not over sorry at being arrested. They will be less furious, less eager in R——'s pursuit, said I to myself, and should they proceed to a trial I may be able to meet it in a way most creditable to his reputation. It seemed to me I was thus acquitting