to more solid diversions, while all the stings of desire settled so fiercely in that little centre of them, that I could not mistake the spot I wanted a play-fellow in. I now shun'd all company in which there was no hopes of coming at the object of my longings, and used to shut my self up, to indulge in solitude some tender meditation on the pleasures, I strongly perceiv'd the overture of, in feeling and examining what nature assur'd me must be the chosen avenue, the gates for the unknown bliss to enter at, that I panted after.
But these meditations only encreased my disorder, and blew the fire that consum'd me. It was yet worse when yeilding at length to the insupportable irritations of the little fairy charm that tormented me; I searched it with my fingers, teazing it to no end. Sometimes, in the furious excitations of desire, I threw my self on my bed, spread my thighs abroad, and lay as it were expecting the long'd for relief, till finding my illusion, I shut and squeez'd them together again, burning
