Page:Spiritual exercise of soul, and blessed departure of Dame Mary Rutherford Lady Hundaly, and Mary M'Konnel, cousin to the said lady; which fell out in the year 1640; both died in London.pdf/13

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who has been so loving to me, while I have been so unthankful to him, and so great a Backslider from him? and yet I had no Sorrow, Grief nor Repentance therefore. Said I, Consider what Repentance is: It consists in Sorrow for Sin, Confession of it to God, earnest Calling on him in Christ's Name for Pardon, and a Resolution to amend in all Time coming: Have he performed these four?

No indeed, said she. Said I, Have ye endeavoured to perform them? Said she, I have had an Endeavour, but what Matter of that? Said I, Lord forbid there were no Matter of it, and that God accepted of nothing but the Deed: Assure your self God accepts of our Endeavours, yea, of our weakest Endeavours: Remember ye not Mr. David Dickson's crying? God accepts the Will and Endeavour for the sorry Act it self. The thou cannot say thou lovest Christ, yet could thou fain love him? would thou fain Love sorrow, Grace or a broken Heart? Christ accepts of that for Love, Sorrow, Grace or a broken Heart.

Said she, It is true indeed that a small Endeavour will be accepted, if it be sincere and true; But how shall I know a true Endeavour and Desire from a false? Said I, Try the Object and End of your Desire, if both be Christ, or something else. The End of a true Desire in Christ, nothing will satisfy your Desire but the Enjoyment of him. Give a hungry Man never so much Gold, it will not satisfy him, if he get not Bread, so nothing will satisfy your Desire, if true, but that which ye desired; and, I am sure, this holds true in you; for tho' you should get all the World, it would not satisfy you, except you get Christ. Said she, I are not deny but I have a Desire, but it is not enough, desire him not so much, nor crave him so earnestly I should. Said I, Will ye never leave off these Words, England and Should? This smells of a Perfection that ye are seeking in yourself. Ye said before, Ye longed not so much for Christ as ye could: I say, Only acknowledge to Christ your Desire, and say, I cannot get enough of Desire to thee, and he will give to you: Ye have nothing as ye should: Look through all the Bible, and see if ever God said, That he that

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