Page:The Romance of Isabel, Lady Burton.djvu/191

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At Last
161

ments. Gowns, presents, and wedding pageants had no part in it, had no place.

The following were my reflections[1]:

"The principal and leading features of my future life are going to be:

"Marriage with Richard.

"My parents' blessing and pardon.

"A man-child.

"An appointment, money earned by literature and publishing.

"A little society.

"Doing a great deal of good.

"Much travelling.

"I have always divided marriage into three classes—Love, Ambition, and Life. By Life I mean a particular style of life and second self that a peculiar disposition and strong character require to make life happy, and without which possibly neither Love alone nor Ambition alone would satisfy it. And I love a man in whom I can unite all three, Love, Life, and Ambition, of my own choice. Some understand Ambition as Title, Wealth, Estates; I understand it as Fame, Name, Power. I have undertaken a very peculiar man; I have asked a difficult mission of God, and that is to give me that man's body and soul. It is a grand mission; and after ten years and a half of prayer God has given it to me. Now we must lead a good, useful, active, noble life, and be each other's salvation; and if we have children, bring them up in the fear of God. The first thing to be done is to obtain my parents'

  1. From her devotional book Laméd.