The old rector, Mr. Elford, did not live at the Parsonage at Lew, but in Tavistock, whence he rode over on Saturday, slept and had his meals at the house, and returned on the Monday. The Bishop remonstrated with him for non-residence.
"My Lord," said he, "how can I live in a place where there is no barber to curl my wig?"
That was satisfactory, and residence was no further pressed.
On one occasion, when visited by her granddaughters, Lady Northcote and Lady Young, they found the old lady on the top of a hay-rick. She came down to them, looked them over from head to foot, and exclaimed:
"What do you mean, coming into the country and our miry lanes, with gloves on your feet?"
Madam Gould had a famous black bull. The Duke of Bedford sent over repeatedly offering a large sum for it. But no—she would not part with it. Then the Duke sent: "Tell Madam that if she will sell me the black bull, I will ride full gallop down Lew Hill without saddle and bridle, and with my hands in my pockets.
That hill-road is now abandoned to become a pathway. It is a break-neck descent. She was so pleased with his offer, that she sent the bull to his Grace as a present.
A burglar and his crew were about and managed to get into houses by descending the chimneys. She had iron bars put across the hall chimney, with spikes upwards, that the man descending rapidly might impale himself thereon, should he attempt that mode of ingress. For the other chimneys she had sheet-iron extinguishers made to be put up the chimneys inverted. Should a burglar descend into one of these with his own weight he would bring it down.
"Then," said Old Madam, "all we will have to do is to invert the extinguisher and hold the man down till the constable comes."
"But," said the footman, "like that, the rogue will be imprisoned heels over head."
"So much the worse for him," replied Madam. "If a man puts himself in a difficult position, he must take the consequences, and remain heels over head."
The contrivance for the hall chimney I removed, and it is still preserved in the house.
