Page:The Posthumous Papers of the Pickwick Club.djvu/503

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415
POSTHUMOUS PAPERS OF THE PICKWICK CLUB
415

THE PICKWICK CLUB. 415

ance Outside a stable-door at the bottom of a long^ back lane without a thoroughfare, a groom in undress was idling about, apparently per- suading himself that he was doing something with a spade and a wheelbarrow. We may remark, in this place, that we have scarcely ever seen a groom near a stable, in his lazy moments, who has not been, to a greater or less extent, the victim of this singular delusion.

Sam thought he might as well talk to this groom as to any one else, especially as he was very tired with walking, and there was a good large stone just opposite the wheelbarrow; so he strolled down the lane, and, seating himself on the stone, opened a conversation with the ease and freedom for which he was remarkable. " Mornin', old friend," said Sam.

" Arternoon, you mean," replied the groom, casting a surly look at Sam.

" You 're wery right, old friend," said Sam ; " I do mean arternoon. How are you ? "

" Why, I don't find myself much the better for seeing of you," re- plied the ill-tempered groom.

" That 's wery odd — that is," said Sam, *' for you look so uncom- mon cheerful, and seem altogether so lively, that it does vun's heart good to see you."

The surly groom looked surlier still at this, but not sufBciently so to produce any effect upon Sam, who immediately inquired, with a countenance of great anxiety, whether his master's name was not Walker.

" No, it ain't," said the groom. " Nor Brown, I s'pose ? " said Sam. « No, it ain't." " Nor Vilson?"

" No ; nor that neither," said the groom.

" Veil," replied Sam, " then I 'm mistaken, and he hasn't got the honour o' my acquaintance, which I thought he had. Don't vait here out o' compliment to me/' said Sam, as the groom wheeled in the bar- row, and prepared to shut the gate. ** Ease afore ceremony, old boy ; I '11 excuse you."

" I 'd knock your head off for half-a-crown," said the surly groom, bolting one half of the gate.

" Couldn't afford to have it done on those terms," rejoined Sam. " It 'ud be vurth a life's board vages, at least, to you, and 'ud be cheap at that. Make my compliments in-doors. Tell 'em not to vait dinner for me, and say they needn't mind puttin' any by, for it *il be cold afore I come in.'*

In reply to this, the groom, waxing very wroth, muttered a desire to damage somebody's head ; but disappeared without carrying it into exe- cution, slamming the door angrily after him, and wholly unheeding Sam's affectionate request, that he would leave him a lock of his hair, before he went.

Sam continued to sit on the large stone, meditating upon what was best to be done, and revolving in his mind a plan for knocking at all the