future I will honour thee, by loving thee to the utmost of my power. Give me light and strength to do so. Thou wouldst have me be wholly thine, and such do I desire to be. Help me by thy grace; in thee do I confide. And in you also do I confide, O Mary, my mother, and my hope.
Meditation Thirty-third.
On turning away from God by sin.
I. ST. AUGUSTIN and St.Thomas define mortal
sin to be a turning away from God: that is, turning
one’s back upon God, leaving the Creator for the
sake of the creature. What punishment would
that subject deserve who, while his king was giving
him a command, contemptuously turned his back
upon him to go and transgress his orders? This
is what the sinner does; and this is punished in
hell with the pain of loss, that is, the loss of God,
a punishment richly deserved by him who in this
life turns his back upon his Sovereign good. Alas!
my God, I have frequently turned my back upon
thee; but I see that thou hast not yet abandoned
me; I see that thou approachest me, and inviting
me to repentance, dost offer me thy pardon. I am
sorry above every evil for having offended thee, do
thou have pity on me.
II. Thou hast forsaken me, saith the Lord, thou hast gone backward. Jer. xv. 6. God complains and says: Ungrateful soul, thou hast forsaken me! I should never have forsaken thee, hadst not thou first turned thy back upon me: thou hast gone backward. O God, with what consternation will these words fill the soul of the sinner when he shall stand to be judged before thy divine tribunal! Thou mak-
