Page:The Works of the Rev. Jonathan Swift, Volume 8.djvu/300

From Wikisource
Jump to navigation Jump to search
This page has been proofread, but needs to be validated.
290
POLITE CONVERSATION.

Miss. Well, you may make a secret of it, but we can spell, and put together.

Neverout. Miss, what spells b double uzzard?

Miss. Buzzard in your teeth, Mr. Neverout.

Lady Smart. Now you are up, Mr. Neverout; will you do me the favour, to do me the kindness, to take off the teakettle?

Ld. Sparkish. I wonder what makes these bells ring.

Lady Answ. Why, my lord, I suppose, because they pull the ropes.

[Here all laugh.


Neverout plays with a teacup.


Miss. Now a child would have cried half an hour before it would have found out such a pretty plaything.

Lady Smart. Well said, miss: I vow, Mr. Neverout, the girl is too hard for you.

Neverout. Ay, miss will say any thing but her prayers, and those she whistles.

Miss. Pray, colonel, make me a present of that pretty penknife.

Ld. Sparkish. Ay, miss, catch him at that, and hang him.

Col. Not for the world, dear miss, it will cut love.

Ld. Sparkish. Colonel, you shall be married first, I was going to say that.

Lady Smart. Well, but for all that, I can tell who is a great admirer of miss: pray, miss, how do you like Mr. Spruce? I swear, I have often seen him cast a sheep's eye out of a calf's head at you: deny it if you can.

Miss. O, madam; all the world knows that Mr. Spruce is a general lover.

Col.