LETTER CLXXII.
To Mr. and Mrs. D.
On board the Savannah, bound to Philadelphia from Georgia, April, 4, 1740.
My dear friends,
SINCE I wrote last, we have buried our Sister L. Rachel I left at Philadelphia, and sister T seems to be in a declining state; so that sister A alone is like to be left of all the women which came over with me from England. I find by experience, that a mistress is absolutely necessary for the due management of my increasing family, and to take off some of that care, which at present lies upon me. Besides, I shall in all probability, at my next return from England, bring more women with me: and I find, unless they are all truly gracious (or indeed if they are) without a superior, matters cannot be carried on as becometh the gospel of Jesus Christ. It hath been therefore much impressed upon my heart, that I should marry, in order to have a help meet for me in the work whereunto our dear Lord Jesus hath called me. This comes (like Abraham's servant to Rebekah's relations) to know whether you think your daughter, Miss E, is a proper person to engage in such an undertaking? If so; whether you will be pleased to give me leave to propose marriage unto her? You need not be afraid of sending me a refusal. For, I bless God, if I know any thing of my own heart, I am free from that foolish passion, which the world calls Love. I write, only because I believe it is the will of God, that I should alter my state; but your denial will fully convince me, that your daughter is not the person appointed by God for me. He knows my heart; I would not marry but for him, and in him, for ten thousand worlds.—But I have sometimes thought Miss E would be my help-mate; for she has often been impressed upon my heart. I should think myself safer in your family, because so many of you love the Lord Jesus, and consequently would be more watchful over my precious and immortal soul. After strong crying and tears at the throne of grace for direction, and after unspeakable troubles with my own heart, I write this.
