sensibility of theirs increase. To tear oneself entirely from every relationship with the rest of the world, to ignore it entirely, to seclude oneself completely, is in no way possible. The relationship will at once be re-established, through the atmosphere, if it has been broken off in some other way.
This atmosphere seems to be strangely oppressive to me. The consciousness of being surrounded by a world so unintellectual and soulless, so completely insensible and unimpressionable to truly humane aspirations, presses upon me and disquiets me, as if I were a prisoner in the midst of liberty. I shall try to liberate myself by returning into bondage. *********
When I shall come to New York, for the purpose of taking leave, I shall hand all my papers over to you. I have not yet arranged them all, and still find much that must be consigned to the flames, because it is too insignificant, or immature. You can then do with the package whatever you please. I give you completely free play. At any rate you will not have to complain of a lack of frankness, truthfulness and recklessness. I make only one condition, to begin with: you are not to make my name known before — well, before you hear of my death. I do not mean to say that I hope to die soon, but that is not within our power. Should you, however, succeed in organizing your colony of the despairing, I promise to become a member, and shall induce those to whom I shall have to devote myself over there to come, too. *********
