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Trinacria’s chillier twin, may stand
Comparison with Arva Pharphar,
Troy, Islington, Jerusalem,
With th’ Hiawathian Minnehaha
Or Milton’s other place—ahem!
Choose any other fit comparative,
For now I must set forth my narrative.
Arrived (no easy task), he chartered
A room,—for though the town is squalid,
Scarce lighted by petroleum dips,
And with a cobbled pavement trips
The churl from market late returning,
Till his lop-sided goitre skips
Out of his baggy vest, his wallet’s
Much hungrier paunch and scantier earning
To make acquaintance with—Most solid
Is the true faith of its inhabitants
In masses, popes and heavenly hopes
And suchlike gear, so that like rabid ants
Dragging their eggs this way and that,
If you should squash their ant-hill flat,
Its starving female wens swarm altar-wards,
At holy Mary’s shrine to falter words
Of prayer, their neck balloons removed,
May be; prayers mixed with priest-approved
Promises of fat capon-boons,
Or in default of these cocoons
And such brave knick-knacks slid down planes
Of inclined deal, from th’ iron screen
Outside which Goitre writhes and strains
In pious ecstacy to where within
The virgin puppet, dressed in green,
