HIS ANSWER WAS READY
"Little boy," asked a well-meaning farmer, "is that your mamma over there with the beautiful set of furs?"
"Yes, sir," answered the boy.
"Well," continued the man, "do you know what poor animal it was that had to suffer in order that your mother might have the furs with which she adorns herself so proudly?"
"Yes, sir," answered the boy quickly, "my papa."
HOW STUPID
Mrs. Wayback—"And are the city people as smart as they say, Ezra?"
Mr. Wayback (lately returned from the city)—"Well, I should say not. Talk about ignorance. They've even got to have signs in their subways telling them which way is up and which is down."
Teacher—"Johnny, give a sentence using the word notwithstanding."
Johnny—"The cow went lame, but not with standing."—Tatler.
First Senior—"How long does it take you to get all your lessons?"
Second Senior—"I don't know; I never tried."—Tatler.
THE UNDIVINE COMEDY
Paradise—
A shaded room,
An open fire;
A cozy nook,
And your heart's desire.
Purgatory—
The self-same room,
With lights, a few;
The self-same nook,
With ma there too.
Inferno—
The room, the shade,
The nook, the fire,
The blessed chance.
And enter—Sire.—Ex.
A SAD END OF A COW
A Vo'usia county farmer lost a cow in a queer manner. The animal in rumaging through a summer kitchen found and swallowed an old umbrella and a cake of yeast. The yeast, fermenting in the poor beast's stomach, raised the umbreila, and she died in great agony.—Ex.
'Twas in the restaurant they met,
Romeo and Juliet,
'Twas there he first got into debt,
For Romeo-owed what Julia-et.—Ex.
Sacred Music
Good sacred songs are constantly in demand. To meet the constant call the Music Department of Barton & Blake Furniture Co., has installed 100 selected sacred songs of uniform excellence, each one by a composer of acknowledged standing, and of practical religious value.
In addition to the sacred collection it has been found necessary to put in stock thirty-nine "song hits," but the term "song hits" distinctly applies to this offering not, however, in the sense that most generally applies, that the song is here today and gone tomorrow. These songs by American composers are successful in the true meaning of the term,, they have become standard and more in demand to day than ever.
Mr. Neubauer will play them over for you any afternoon between 2 and 6.
Music Department
Barton & Blake Furniture Co.
Provo, Utah
After High School
What?
That Is The Question
Which confronts every high school student. Shall he continue in his efforts and gain a college education, or shall he rest content with what be has? The far-sighted student will persevere because
IT PAYS
financially, intellectually, morally and physically. To-day, industrial, practical education is of collegiate grade. You may get your college degree in Agriculture, in Home Economics, in Commerce, or in General Science at the
UTAH AGRICULTURAL COLLEGE
LOGAN, UTAH
Write for catalog. Address: The
President's Office,
U.A.C.LOGAN, UTAH
Both Phones 77
The Provo Foundry and Machine Co.-INC0RP0RATED Thos. F . Pierpont, Mgr. General Foundry and Machine work, Mining Cars, Building Iron, Iron and Brass Castings, Engine and Boiler Repairs, Cast and Wrought Iron Pipe. MODERN HEATtNG AND PLUMBING Automobile Sa!e, Repair and Sup- ply Garage S. W. Sharp, Prop. F. R . Sharp, Mgr. Sharp's Livery Livef^ Feed and Transfer Stable Hacks Meet all Trains Telephones: Bell, 31-black Provo, Utah Ind. 3!
