The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman/Volume 3/Chapter 32

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CHAP. XXXII.

———" Because," quoth my grandmother, repeating the words again,—"you have little or no nose, Sir"—

S'death! cried my great grandfather, clapping his hand upon his nose,—'tis not so small as that comes to;—'tis a full inch longer than my father's.—Now, my great grandfather's nose was for all the world like unto the noses of all the men, women, and children, whom Pantagruel found dwelling upon the island of Ennasin.—By the way, if you would know the strange way of getting a-kin amongst so flat-nosed a people,—you must read the book;—find it out yourself, you never can.—

—'Twas shaped, Sir, like an ace of clubs.

—'Tis a full inch, continued my great grandfather, pressing up the ridge of his nose with his finger and thumb; and repeating his assertion,—'tis a full inch longer, madam, than my father's—. You must mean your uncle's, replied my great grandmother.

—My great grandfather was convinced.—He untwisted the paper, and signed the article.