The Pearl/Volume 13
La Rose D'Amour. 
Or the Adventures of a Gentleman in search of Pleasure. Translated from the French.
The morning after our arrival, on awakening, I roused up the sleeping beauties who lay around me, and led them to the bathing-apartment.
We all entered the water, and after sporting for an hour or more, we issued from it, and entering the dressing room, made our morning toilets, the girls dressed in cymar, pants and vest, such as those worn by the Odalisques in the East.
This day was made all preparations on a splendid scale for the great sacrifice of the night, the taking of Laura's maidenhead.
We spent the time in roving about the park until noon; running, jumping and tussling, so as to keep up an excited circulation of the blood.
The dinner, which I had ordered three hours later than usual, consisted of all the most highly seasoned dishes and of the richest and most exhilarating wines, of which we partook to a slight excess and at last rose from the table with our amorous propensities aroused to the highest pitch.
We retired to the bedchamber, and stripping ourselves we again sought the bath, which was highly scented with the most costly perfumes.
Remaining but a short time in the bath, we went to the bedchamber, and Rose and Marie having drawn aside the heavy hangings, we entered the state-apartment.
Here Celestine and Manette, with towels of the finest linen, absorbed the water from the body and hair of Laura, while Rosalie and Caroline did the same for me.
While they were combing out the rich auburn tresses which floated in wavy masses over her neck and shoulders, I was on my knees before her, combing out the black silken hair which grew, with a luxuriance seldom seen in girls of seventeen, out of the fattest little hillock I ever saw and almost hid the entrance to the beautiful grotto beneath.
Having combed out her precious locks, comme il faut, and parted them from around the mouth of the greedly little maw, which was shortly and for the first time to partake and eat of the flesh, with the tips of my fingers I open the pouting lips and feast my eyes with gazing on the deep carnation of the luscious love-niche, in which I was soon to put the idol. I peep, gaze, look and try to get a further insight into the hidden mysteries of the deep, dark, cavernous recess; but my sight could penetrate no further than a most tempting bit of flesh, somewhat in the shape of a heart, which appeared to be pendant, like a dazzling light from the ceiling of a room, in the centre of the passage to the unexplored cavern, through the folding doors of which I was peeping.
My enraptured eyes still gaze on the tempting titbit before me, till, recalled to my senses by feeling something moving between my thighs, and looking down, I perceive the hand of Celestine clasped around my noble shaft, and slowly drawing her hand up and down it, covering and uncovering its beautiful red head with the fine white skin which lay around the neck in folds.
This at once gave an impetus to my desires, which could not be restrained. I raised up, and catching Laura in my arms, I carried her to the bed and placed her on it, the firm semiglobes of her backside resting on the edge of the bed, supported by a cushion of white satin, covered with an embroidered cloth of fine linen.
Celestine and Caroline support each a leg, while Rose and Marie jump onto the bed, and Manette and Rosalie stand on either side to support me, in case my feelings should overpower me at the close of the performance, and also to serve as pilots for me - the one to open the gate of love, the other to guide the fiery dart aright into the entrance. Fearing somewhat for the little maid, who was to undergo the process of defloration, and knowing that the rose was not without its thorn and that the sting would at first be pretty severe, I anointed my impatient virgin-destroyer with perfumed oil, and marched to the battlefield, determined to conquer or to die.
Her legs were held apart. I enter between and plant a soft kiss on the lips which I was about cruelly to tear open, which seemed to send a thrill of joy through her.
I slightly incline forward; the tips of Manette's fingers part the rosy lips. Rosalie grasps hold of my pego and lodges the head in the entrance.
The two girls, who support her legs, rest them on my hips, and standing behind me, cross their arms with joined hands so that the ankles rest on them as on a cushion. Gathering myself up, I make one fierce lunge forward and gain full an inch.
The sudden distention of the parts cause her to scream with pain and to wriggle her rump in such manner that instead of in any way ridding herself of me, it was a help to me in my endeavours to penetrate still further.
I thrust harder, I penetrate, I pierce her. The blood begins to flow. I feel it on my thighs. Her buttocks are convulsively twitching and wriggling in endeavours to throw me off. In her agony she utters scream after scream.
Poor little maid, it is a rough and thorny way to travel. But once gone over, the road is ever after smooth. Again I thrust forward.
"Ah, my God!" she exclaims, "I shall die! Have mercy on me!"
I have no pity on her and shove harder than ever to put her out of her pain and agony. I tear her open, carrying everything before me, and one last shove sends me crowned with victory into the very sanctum of love amidst the clapping of hands and the shouts of triumph by those who surround us.
No sooner was I buried in her to the extremest point than I lay quivering and gasping on her belly, spending into her womb a flood of boiling sperm.
I soon regained new life and vigour, and drawing myself out to the head, commenced a to-and-fro friction that caused no more than a few "ahs" and deep-drawn sighs, as the sperm I had injected into her had oiled the parts and made the way comparatively easy for the dear creature who lay under me.
She now received my thrusts and shoves with a slight quivering of her rump. She clasps me in her arms, she closes her eyes. A few energetic heaves and the dear girl feels pleasure, despite that pain that a woman experiences in having drawn from her for the first time by a man the milk of human kindness.
I too meet her and again melt away in her, fairly drenching her with the copious draughts of the liquid I spurted into her.
At last I rise up from off my lovely victim, leaving her a bleeding sacrifice on the altar of love.
The girls gathered around Laura congratulating her on being transformed from a maid into a woman. The entrance being forced, she could henceforth drive into the boundless pleasures and joys of love without feeling pain.
They raised her up whilst cleaning her of the blood that dyed her thighs and buttocks, I took up the consecrated cushion and its bloody covering and directed one of them prepare the bed for us. I - but no. I determined to give her a little rest, and ordering the girls to prepare a cold supper, told them to awake me in two hours, and we fell asleep in each other's arms.
After sleeping for some time, Laura awoke much refreshed, but still feeling sore from the severe battering she had received.
The table being laid alongside the bed, we reclined on it, the others sitting around the table on cushions.
Not feeling much inclined to eat, I commenced dallying with my bedfellow, railing her on the feelings she experienced while I was taking her maidenhead, till the spirit began to wax powerful within me, whereupon I laid her down flat on her back and fell with my face downward upon her, and thence followed what the spirit moveth. Yes, verily, we did mighty deeds of fucking that night, and it was not until after the sixth operation, or moving of the spirit, that we lay exhausted in each other's arms and fell asleep.
In a few days after there arrived at the mouth of the creek a fine large steam-brig, which dropped anchor and sent a boat ashore with the captain, who delivered me a letter from my banker, stating who and what the officers and crew were and upon what terms they had been engaged.
I immediately walked down to the creek and going into the boat with the captain, we pulled on board. I examined her decks, masts, etc., and then descended to the cabin, which extended my most sanguine expectations, so magnificently was it fitted up. The cabin contained six staterooms, very large and splendidly fitted up, equalling in style and ornament the most elegant boudoir I had ever seen in Paris.
I questioned the captain, who was English, as well as the whole crew, in regard to the men on board.
He said that he and his men had been employed to serve me in any way I might think proper, so long as I did not command him to commit piracy. That he and the crew were paid enormous wages, and that they were bound and felt ready and willing to follow me to "heaven or hell," if I but showed them the way.
On questioning the stewards, I found the brig to be well stored with all the luxuries that could be procured.
I ascended to the deck with the captain, and passing the word forward for all hands to come aft, I had a crew of most hardy and devil-may-care looking fellows around me in a trice, standing respectfully hats in hand.
I made them a short address, laying open to them my intentions, and stating the service I required of them.
I gave the captain his orders to be in readiness to sail in two days and I returned to the chateau.
Summoning the steward I directed him to prepare everything for our voyage, as I determined to start in two days for Constantinople.
I then directed a page to send the women to me. On their entering, I made them all strip to the skin and examined the cunts and several charms of each of them with a critical eye, endeavouring when all were most lusciously beautiful to select one as my compagnon de voyage; but not being able to choose among so many loves I left it to chance.
Taking up a dice-box, I made each throw in her turn. La Rose D' Amour and my fair Russian, Caroline, made the highest throws and I determined to take both.
After they had cast their dies, I informed them what my object was. Whereupon, Laura, my last love, who bye-the-bye, was a great libertine, fell on her knees before me weeping, and begged me to take her with me.
It was impossible for me to take more than two, I told her; it was no use to grieve about the matter as she could not go, but that I would pass all my remaining time with her.
Leaving the chateau in the care of my trusty stewards and followers, I embarked, taking with me over one million in francs in gold, for the purpose of purchasing slaves in Constantinople.
After a pleasant voyage of about two weeks, I arrived at the capital of the Turkish Empire.
At the earliest opportunity I presented my letters to some of the most wealthy and influential foreigners under a fictitious name.
I soon became acquainted with many wealthy Turks and among them three or four slave-merchants.
I then hired an interpreter, and paying a visit to one of the merchants, engaged him as an agent to find out and procure me a lot of the handsomest females to be found in the market. And knowing that the poor class of the inhabitants were in the daily habit of selling their daughters, such as were handsome enough to grace the harems of the rich and lustful Turks, I directed him to send out some of his emissaries to search out all the families among the poor quarters who had beautiful girls and who would be apt to exchange them for gold.
In the course of a few days my agent called on me, stating that he was about to go on a three days' trip from the city to the house of an old broker-merchant of his who was continually in receipt of girls from the interior of the kingdom, and occasionally of a few from Circassia. That for certain reasons he never came to the city, but on receipt of any new beauties he always wrote, and he, my agent, went to his place of residence and either bargained for or took the females to Constantinople and sold them on commission.
He said that when I first called on him he wrote to his correspondent in the country, who replied that he had several very fine girls, one in particular whom he named Ibzaidu, who, he said, was fit to adorn the harem of the Grand Sultan.
I told my agent, Ali Hassan, to start immediately and to bring the lot, if they were beautiful, to the city.
In the interim of his absence, attended by my interpreter, I sauntered day and night through the streets and bazaazs, endeavouring to spy out some of the beauties of the place; but all in vain. I could not catch even a glimpse of a female face.
On the evening of the ninth day from his leaving me, Ali called on me, saying that he had brought with him seven slaves, who were safe in his harem, and invited me to call at his house in the morning and examine them.
He ran perfectly wild in his praises of Ibzaidu, whom he pronounced to be more beautiful than a houri, the nee plus ultra of Circassian beauty. About eleven o'clock the following day, I went to Ali's house, and immediately entered on business.
He retired for a few minutes to give orders for the slaves to prepare for my visit.
In the course of half-an-hour a eunuch entered, made a salaam to his master, and retired.
Ali arose, and inviting me to follow, led the way into a large and elegantly furnished apartment in his harem.
On entering, I beheld six girls seated on the cushions at one side of the room, dressed in loose Turkish pants of white satin and vested of rich embroidered stuff.
In the centre of the room was a couch and at one end of it stood two eunuchs. After surveying them as they sat, and noting their different styles of beauty - knowing it to be customary - I told Ali that I wished to examine them in a perfectly naked state to ascertain if they were still virgins, as he represented them to be. And also that I wished to see if the several parts of their bodies corresponded in beauty with their faces.
He immediately led one of them out on the floor beside me, and spoke a few words to her and the others in Turkish. I then made a sign for him and the eunuchs to go out and leave me alone with the females.
They retired, and taking hold of the girl's hand, I signed her to strip, which she refused to do. I entreated and urged her as well as I could by signs to do so; but she crossed her hands over her breast, refusing to do it, I clapped my hands and Ali and his eunuchs entered. I merely nodded my head to him when he pointed his finger at the girl and the eunuchs caught hold of her and in a trice stripped her naked. I then went up to her, laid my hand on her firm round bubbies, pressed and moulded them, felt her waist, rubbed my hand lower down, onto the mossy covering of her cunt, she sprang from me and catching up some of her clothes, wrapped them round her body, and sat down in one corner.
Ali stamped his foot on the floor, and the eunuchs took her and carrying her threw her on her back on the couch.
One held her down by the shoulders, while the other caught hold of one leg and Ali of the other, stretching them wide apart, I fell on my knees between them, and with my fingers opened the lips of her cunt. On attempting to insert one of them into it, and finding that I could barely force the tips in, which caused her to wince and cry out, and to twist her backside about, I desisted, firmly persuaded that she had her maidenhead inviolate.
Whilst they held her on the couch, I examined, felt, and kissed every part of her; and having provided myself with such things on purpose, I placed on her wrist, neck, and finger, a bracelet, necklace, and ring. Making a sign they let her rise, and giving her her clothes, she dressed and sat down much pleased with and examining her jewels.
I now led out another girl, and made a sign for her to undress which she took no notice of, standing with her arms crossed, and her head hanging down. I took her hands and removing them from her breasts proceeded to take her vest, and as she did not resist, I told Ali and his slaves to go and wait outside the room.
I then stripped her of her pants and cymar and was much pleased with her beauty. I led her up to the couch and sitting down drew her to my side, handling her breasts, feeling her arms, belly, thighs, twining my fingers about in the luxurious growth of hair that overgrew the grotto underneath, to all of which she made no resistance.
At last I laid her down on her back and spreading her thighs apart, inspected her cunt, and found she was still possessed of all the signs of virginity. I also gave her jewels, such as I gave the first one, and inspected the balance in the same manner, picking out one after one.
Two I found not to be virgins, and one was bandy-legged although handsome in every other respect.
I called in Ali and enquired where the beautiful Ibzaidu was, desiring him to bring her to me.
Ali clapped his hands and two female slaves entered leading her in. Then they retired leaving her standing before me. She was enveloped in a piece of fine Indian muslin and had a veil over her face.
I raised the veil and started back in amazement at the dazzling beauty of her face.
I then caught hold of the drapery in which she was enveloped, and gently drawing it from her clasp, I threw it on one side and gazed with admiration on the most ravishingly beautiful form and figure I ever beheld.
Hers was one of those oval majestic figures, such as poets and mythologists attribute to Juno.
I much admired her rich jet-black hair which clustered in ringlets over her neck and shoulders, contrasting singularly with the dazzling whiteness of her skin. Her shoulders were finely formed, her arms, plump, beautifully rounded, would cause a sigh of desire to arise in any breast, to be clasped in their embrace. Her breasts, luxuriously large, hard and firm, white as snow-flakes, tipped with deliciously small nipples, of that fine pink color which so strongly denotes virginity in the possessor.
Her waist was gracefully elegant and tapering; her belly fine, round, and, with the whiteness of alabaster, soft as the finest velvet down. Her hips were very large and wide, whilst her buttocks swelling out behind into two hillocks of snowy-white flesh, firm and springy to the touch, gave token of the vivacity and liveliness with which their owner would enter into the delicious combats of love.
Her thighs were of a largeness and fleshy plumpness seldom seen in a female, with the knees small, while the calf was large in proportion to the thigh. The ankle tapering, and a foot delicately small, spoke plainly to the looker-on that the seat and centre of love, that dear part of woman which takes away the senses of all men, was an equally small and elegant pattern.
Her chin was most charmingly dimpled, her lips, full and pouting, slightly open, gave just a glimpse of two rows of ivory, which appeared set in the deep rosy flesh of her small and elegant mouth. Her nose was of the Grecian cast, her eyes of a sparkling lustrous black, and the forehead was middling high. She was, in fact, the very beau ideal of female beauty.
What ease and grace reigned in every part. With what a sylph-like springy motion she moved, as I led her towards the couch on which I stretched her out. There I examined minutely all her secret charms. I felt and handled every part.
Her cunt was ravishing, beyond all description. The mossy Mount of Venus swelled up into a hillock of firm flesh, surmounted and covered with rich, mossy, coal-black hair, straight and fine as silk. The lips were most luscious, fat, rosy, pouting beauties. On opening them, I felt for her clitoris and found it to be extremely large, while the orifice was narrow and small indeed, apparently not larger than a girl's of eleven or twelve years of age.
"God of love!" I exclaimed on viewing it, "here is a maidenhead that might have tempted Jupiter from Olympus, a prophet from the arms of the houris in Paradise, or an anchorite from his cell."
Handling and examining so many lovely things had set me on fire and I could hardly restrain myself from immolating her on the altar as a sacrificial offering to the god of voluptuous love.
I drew myself away from her and signed her to rise up and resume her drapery.
I then concluded the bargain for the purchase of Ibzaidu, and for the first three I had chosen.
After settling with Ali, I told him that he must let me have the use of a part of his house, including the harem, during my stay, so that I should be able to guard safely my slaves and to have for them proper attendance. Also, that he must instantly purchase for me six or eight mutes and eunuchs, which he immediately set about, whilst I returned to my house to get my money, jewels, etc., and also to bring away Caroline and her companion.
(To be continued.)
Dr. Tanner's Fast of Forty Days. 
A correspondent in New York writes to the Editor of THE PEARL, to say that, for the last three weeks of the terrible experiment, the Doctor's penis, which in its normal condition would be eight and a half inches when in a state of erection, was shriveled up to less than an inch in length, and no handling or frigging could induce either stiffness or emission.
Julien's Concert. 
Now music being the food of love I thought that I would go
To Julien's concert; for I heard the price was very low.
It being nearly eight o'clock, so in I toddled quick,
To hear the quadrille and see great Julien shake his pr-
The little staff about, and I've been told by jokers
That the ladies they do all agree that he's the prince of pokers.
The ladles they were highly dressed - naked, almost stark,
Their muslin being thin enough to see the watermark;
I gazed on one, a beauteous maid, her smile was bright and sunny,
She'd a nice small mouth and golden hair and a fine full open cunny.
Being so, I introduced myself to her so gentle,
She said, she'd come there for an hour with something instrumental.
I gently sat down by her side while glowing like a fire;
The smile she gave I must admit I really did admire.
Said she: "The band is going to play." Said I: "'Twill shake the walls."
"Oh, no," said she, "that's only when great Julien shakes his ball—
My bunch of rosy locks, his staff so well displayed is,
He knows full well a good long piece is sure to please the ladies."
The names of all the instruments she then enquired about
Especially of that long brass-thing that kept sliding in and out.
The fingering of the double-bass she thought was rather slack,
And wondered Julien should engage a man who'd got the clap-
Pers they were an awful bore, and still she would insist on
Me telling her who'd get the horn, and who the cornet a piston.
She said she liked the clarinet, likewise the German flute-
You know all well such instruments the ladies always suit;
The forty parts they were so off they almost made us start,
And the ophicleide would come in just like a thundering fart
Or peal of thunder, but not so far as India;
And the French horn would pop in, to join those things so windy
The place got overpowering; our ears were tired of drumming;
Said she: "I feel I'm going, you'd better be a-coming."
She took my arm, we left the place, I acted as conductor;
I called a cab, and on the road I freely furnished her with my ideas of Julien's improvements,
And so wound up with a grand duet with many pleasing movements.
My Grandmother's Tale or May's Account of Her Introduction to the Art of Love. 
From an unsophisticated Manuscript found amongst the old lady's papers, after her death, supposed to have been written about A.D. 1797.
You know I am a native of the West Indies. I was born in Santa Cruz, where my father had a plantation, and lots of slaves.
The little boys and girls were naked until they were eight or nine years old: I remember being greatly struck with the fine little cocks of the boys, and wondered why they differed so from girls.
The son of our overseer was just my age, about ten. He was a smart intelligent boy, and we used to play together. His name was Joe.
One day I caught him piddling and looking at his cock. I laughed and told him he ought to cut it off, it was so ugly.
He said he would be sorry for he would much rather be a man than a woman, "and when I grow to be a man," he said, "this will grow big."
"How do you know?" I said, putting my hand on it.
"Because I have often seen men naked. Do you know what a man calls it?"
"He calls it a prick."
"And do you know what he does with it?"
"He piddles with it, I suppose, like yourself."
"Ah!" he said, looking very sly, "he does more than that."
"He can put it into a woman between her legs, in that queer little slit you girls have."
"There's no room for it there," I said.
"Yes there is; I'll show you if you'll let me, may I?" he said, lifting my frock.
"You may, just for a minute."
He put his fingers into my cunt and felt about for the opening. At last he found it, and, to my surprise, pushed his forefinger up.
"Stop," I cried, "that hurts."
"I won't hurt you bye-and-bye," he said, with his sly look.
"How, what do you mean?"
"I'll tell you, but mind, it's a great secret. You know Jim who has the cat and flogs the slaves when they misbehave. Well, when the women are sent, he flogs their backs; but when girls are sent he flogs their bottoms. I was near the place when a fine plump girl came from your papa with a note, which I saw afterwards. It had only these words: 'Give this girl twelve lashes. -E. L.'
"Jim brought her in and shut the door but I stole round to a window on the other side and peeped in. He had her kneel on a bench and tied her hands to the block. Then he threw up her petticoat, uncovering her shining black bum, and took out his cat.
"He said: 'Be quiet, Norry. If you let me have my will of you I won't hurt you, but if you won't I'll give it you.'
"He opened his pantaloons and out started, oh! such a big one, it would have frightened you as he pushed it against her bottom. She cried more than ever.
"He brought down the cat with a smart stinging blow on her bottom.
"She jumped and yelled.
'"Be quiet now or you'll get more.'
"She stopped, while he separated her legs as widely as he could. Then stooping, he looked up into her slit, which he kept open with his fingers. I could see that it was very red inside, had plenty of black woolly hair on it.
"Then he put in the head of his prick, and giving a great push, it went in every bit of it. Then he withdrew it out all wet and red looking, and putting his arms round her hips he went on pushing in and out with all his might.
"She did not mind but only poked out her bottom as if to get more of it.
"Then he stopped suddenly, and pressed in hard against her.
"After which he untied her, and giving her a kiss, sent her away."
"That's very odd Joe. It must have hurt her very much."
"Indeed it didn't. She liked it beyond anything. I know it by the way she stuck out her bottom. Will you just try and you'll feel how pleasant it is."
My amorous feelings were aroused, so I did not object to his having a trial. I kneeled on the seat, as he told me, and jutted out my bottom.
He tried to get his cock into my slit, but failed. I put down my hand and kept the lips open, but whether from my immaturity or his inexperience, he could not succeed.
A few days afterwards he came running up to me in great glee, crying out: "I can do it now, Katie, I can do it now!"
"Stop your noise. What do you mean?"
"Stay, Katie, and I will tell you. You know father and I live in the cottage. He has, however, generally one or two of the slave girls with him in the evening. They like to come to him for they get plenty of rum, and are sure of a half holiday next day.
"He sends me to bed and then produces the rum, sugar and water. Last night he had three with him. He sent me off to bed as usual, but I hid behind the door.
"They soon became very merry over the drink and capered about in style. He threw up their petticoats, slapping their bottoms and tickled their cunts, while they pulled out his prick and handled his balls. Then he made them undress and chased them naked around the room. Whenever he caught one, he felt her cunt, and making her kneel would stick his prick into it from behind while the others tickled his balls and bottom. In the midst of the fun, one of them suddenly opened the door, and spying on me, seized me, and dragging me into the room, cried out: 'Oh, here's massa Joe playing bo-peep. What shall we do with him?'
"'Let's strip him,' cried another, 'and we will make him fuck Fanny. She is the youngest and her cunt will fit his little prick best.'
"My father only laughed and said: 'All right, he'll be man enough for any of you some of these days.'
"So I was stripped, nothing loath, and placed over Fanny, who was lying on the floor. She had her legs wide apart and with her fingers kept the lips of her cunt open while one of the others, after kissing and sucking my little cock, pushed it in. Then they clapped my bottom, and sat around to watch the performance.
"Oh, Katie, you can't think how easy my prick slipped into her cunt. And I felt it growing bigger when it got in; she was so hot inside. She then hugged me in her arms and jerked up her bottom, while I worked and pushed as I had seen father do until the nice warm feeling came and I nearly fainted with pleasure.
"I was then glad to get away and creep off to bed, for I was tired and sleepy.
"Look at it, Katie, isn't it larger and stronger than before?"
He held it in his hand and drew back the skin until its head stood up round and red as a cherry.
"Put your hand oh it, Katie. Feel how firm it is!"
I took it in my hand and rubbed it up and down.
"Yes, Joe, it is larger and stronger. You may put it in if you like."
He laid me back, lifted my dress and looked at and felt my cunt.
"Yours is much prettier and nicer than Fanny's, Katie. These soft round white lips are beautiful. Hold them open like a dear girl while I push it in."
I put my hands down and opening the lips with one while with the other I directed the head of his prick to the right spot and told him to push. He did so. It entered. He pushed harder. It got in more and more until it was all enclosed and I felt its head far back.
Oh, sweet sensation! Nothing can exceed the pleasure of feeling one's cunt for the first time filled up with a throbbing heaving prick!
His eyes sparkled and his breath came hard and fast as I hugged him in my arms, and told him to push in his prick and fuck me very well.
Having now ascertained for ourselves the wondrous power we each possessed of conferring pleasure on the other, our play always turned on the practice and enjoyment of love.
We were never tired of examining and petting each other's privates.
And our senses being now fully aroused, we were always the watch to enlarge our experience of the ways and means enjoyment.
My father had several slaves almost white, and most of them good-looking. These were all retained in the house and never sent into the fields.
One pretty little girl named Nina was assigned to me as my waiting-maid. She always attended me in my bath, and used to dry me when I came out. She was particularly attentive to my little slit, on which the hair was just beginning to grow. She used to perfume it, and comb it, and kiss it.
"You have a beautiful cunt, Missy, the sight of it would set any young fellow wild!"
"I suppose it is much the same as other girls', your own for instance. Show it to me, Nina."
She lifted her dress, and opening her thighs, gave me a full view of her cunt. It was a pretty little mouth, with a full rosebud clitoris, and the lips covered with brown silky hair. I put my hand on it, and pushing up my finger, said: "Did this ever set any young fellow wild?"
"Oh, Missy, you must not ask me such questions, or I will have to tell you lies."
"Nina, if you want me to be your friend you will tell everything. But this will do for the present."
My father was in the habit of walking in the garden after sunset when it was nearly dark, to smoke his cigar, and I found out that he always had with him one or the other of the white slaves.
One night I missed Nina, and guessing where she was, I threw on my shawl and went out softly into the garden. I heard voices in a sheltered walk, and as it was almost dark, I was able to get within range of hearing without being seen.
"Now, Nina, be kind and you'll be my pet, and I will give you all sorts of pretty things - there, let me feel it, that's a sweet girl, open your legs more, lean against this tree, hold up your dress, give me your hand, place it here, close your fingers round it. That's the way. You have a dear little cunt, very fat and plump. But I wonder you have much hair on it. How old are you, Nina?"
"Just fifteen, sir."
"Now then, press out in front. Hold my prick, while I push it - there it's in - put your arms round me - press my bottom. How do you like the feel of my prick in your cunt?"
"It feels very nice, push it in more."
I heard them kissing and panting as they shoved together, and then they rested in each other's arms.
She soon left him, after promising to go out at that same hour that day every week.
I often followed him out now, and found he always had one of the slave girls with him.
I then learned all the terms and ways of enjoyment, for he was fond of variety, and loved to make them talk, and say all manner of words while he fucked them. And I was astonished to hear how freely they spoke of pricks, cunts, arses, frigging, fucking, pissing, etc.
Joe had been sent to school and my cunt, not having been entered for a long time, was in an aggravated state of longing and desire.
So, when Nina's turn came next, the thought flashed upon me, why not personate her for one occasion.
I was about her height and size, and my cunt was now pretty well furnished with hair. So when the hour came, I set her to a task which would occupy her for some time, and said I was in a hurry to have it done.
Then, going out in the dark I quietly strolled up the walk. Someone met me, put his arm round me, and pushed his knee in between my thighs.
"How is your sweet cunt tonight?"
I said nothing but only pressed against him as he lifted my dress and felt my cunt.
Moving his finger about, he said: "It's very hot and juicy tonight. I am sure it is longing for a fuck. Put your hand here, my love."
I felt his firm upstanding prick. I moved the loose skin up and down as Joe had taught me. I put my other hand below and felt the two soft balls in their hairy bag.
"Take it in your mouth, dear, for a moment."
I had gone too far to recede now, so I stooped and sucked its glowing head while I tickled him behind the balls.
"Oh, Nina, that's delicious! Now lie back on this moss bank, raise your legs, open your dress, that I may press your soft bubbies, while my prick is in your cunt."
He knelt between my uplifted thighs. He leaned over me. He opened the lips of my cunt. He introduced his prick. He moulded my breasts. He kissed me and darted his tongue into my mouth.
"Say you like it, Nina, my love!"
"Oh, yes dear sir!" I whispered heaving up my bottom. "I feel your prick in my cunt - fucking - fucking - oh! so - deliciously!"
The rapturous feeling increased. He pushed and panted. I heaved and gasped: "Oh, yes, push, fuck, oh! oh! oh!"
He lay over me, his face on my shoulder and his prick buried in my cunt.
After a while he said: "I don't know how it is, Nina, but I never enjoyed fucking you so much before, your cunt closes on my prick with such a hot compression, and you nipped the head of my prick when I drove it home as you never did before, and which only a few women can do. Oh! there! I feel it now!"
(Here I interrupted Kate by asking: "What do you mean by nipping the head of his prick?"
"Well, my dear, I'll teach you. When you feel the entire prick driven in as far as it can go, draw up your bottom inside, as hard as you can. If you do it right you will squeeze the head of the prick as it rests on the mouth of your womb. Try it now while I have my finger in. Yes, that's the way."
"Well, go on, what did he say next?")
He asked me: "Is Miss Kate kind to you?"
"She is," I whispered in reply.
"Don't you attend her in the bath?"
"Does she let you see her cunt?"
"Yes, I dry it and sometimes kiss it."
"Is it a nice little cunt?"
"Do you think she has any longing to have it fucked?"
"I am sure she has, it is always red and hot."
"I guessed as much. Indeed, I often think of it when I observe her swelling hips. How I would enjoy fucking her, if I could only do it without letting her know who it was."
"Perhaps I could manage it for you. Come to my bed tomorrow night and I'll prevail on her to take my place. I'll tell her I expect a young fellow who will take her for me, and give her the greatest pleasure but without doing her any harm. If you find the door of my room unlocked you will know I succeeded."
Next evening, papa did not go out at all and I saw he was regarding me with a peculiar look in his eyes. He was also more affectionate and made me sit on his knee when I was bidding him good-night and he pressed my bottom and thighs in the warmest way.
Nina readily agreed to my taking her place for the night when I told her I had been restless of late and thought a change of my bed would do me good.
About midnight someone entered the room and felt his way to where he heard me breathing. He quietly put off his clothes, and slipped into bed. He put his arm over me and felt my cunt. He opened the lips and rubbed about the clitoris and then tried to push his finger up.
I held his hand.
"Oh, you hurt me!"
"Why, you are not my Nina at all."
"No, I am only Nina's friend."
"Well, whoever you are, you have a sweet cunt. Put your hand on this, it won't hurt you."
"But it will do me harm."
"No, trust me, my pet, I won't harm you."
He then got over me and began to push his prick against my cunt.
"Oh, no, I can't, I am afraid. Oh, pray don't, it is too big!"
I held him by the hips and pushed him back.
"I can't bear it - it will kill me!"
Every time he pushed the head of his prick at the entrance, I shrank from him.
He begged me. He prayed me just to let it in and he would be so very gentle.
He got it in a little way inside the entrance.
"Oh, push easily, or you'll kill me. Oh! Oh!"
"There, now - it is quite in. My precious, I shall not hurt you any more."
He moved his prick very slowly in and out, in and out. I began to heave and twist.
"Darling, this is exquisite! Your cunt is delightfully tight, and its soft pressure most delicious. Put your arms round me, my love! I only once before had such a fuck as this."
I pressed him in my arms, thrust up my bottom to meet every thrust of his prick. I raised my thighs and crossed my legs on his back.
He ran his prick with delightful friction in and out of my throbbing, heaving, panting cunt. I felt a soft hand on my bottom and soft fingers playing about my cunt. I knew they were Nina's, I did not mind. I was intoxicated with pleasure. I squeezed in my bottom to nip his prick.
"Oh! That's grand, who taught you that sweet trick - do it again. Oh! That's splendid!"
Nina got into the bed and pressed against his bottom.
"Oh, Nina you are just in time. Let me get on you that I may spend in your cunt."
He drew out his prick, saying to me: "You know I promised not to harm you; but Nina does not mind the risk for she knows she will be well taken care of. Let us get outside the clothes and take off everything, the night is so warm."
He then got between her uplifted thighs, and resting on her breast, told me to put it in.
I felt her cunt, it was very hot and flowing. I took his prick and rubbed its throbbing head between the soft lips, placed it at the entrance. He pushed, it passed in. I went behind him and holding him around the hips rubbed my cunt against his bottom while he fucked.
He discharged immediately and soon afterwards he bid us good-night and went away.
Nina begged me to excuse her. She said she heard all that passed and got so excited that she could not help coming in to us.
I asked: "Did papa know who your friend was?"
She said she was not certain but thought he did.
There was something peculiar about papa's manner the next morning. He put his arms around me several times, called me his sweet girl, his darling pet. He told me he was making arrangements to send me to England, to have my education completed there. He told me that he had taken my passage in a sugar-brig which was to start in a few days, and which was commanded by a friend of his, a Captain Lemberg, who would take good care of me.
I said I would like it very much but would be sorry to leave him and put my arms round his neck kissing him.
He enfolded me in his; he lifted me off the ground, carrying me to a sofa and laid me down. He sat by me and slipping his hand under my dress put it on my naked bottom.
"My darling," he said, "let me pet you, I feel so fond of you and I won't have you long."
"Dearest papa, you may do anything you please with me, I love to give you pleasure."
He kissed me warmly, turned me on my back, lifted my dress, opened my thighs, and looked at my cunt.
"You are beautifully made here. Tell me, my darling, was it you in Nina's bed last night?"
"It was I, dearest papa; was I very wicked?"
"No, my darling, you gave me the sweetest pleasure I ever had in my life. Did you enjoy what I did to you then?"
"I did indeed, it was most delightful."
"Might I do it to you again?"
"You may, dear papa, if you like."
He drew me to the end of the sofa, made me raise my legs and open them as widely as possible. Then kneeling on the floor, he kissed my cunt. He praised its shape and colour. He opened the lips, put in his tongue and licked the inside round and round. He introduced his prick, pushing it slowly up, and fucked me most delightfully.
I tried all I could to increase and intensify his pleasure. I asked if he was enjoying it much.
"Do you like it, papa?"
"Yes, my sweet pet, your cunt is perfection itself. I envy the man who gets you for a wife."
I now ventured on a request I had long in mind.
"Dear papa, I have one thing to ask you for."
"What is it my pet? I would do anything in the world to gratify you."
"Will you give Nina her freedom and send her to England with me?"
"Surely, my pet, I will do more; if she marries with your consent and approbation I will allow you to present her with a £50 dowry, and besides, you may order whatever dress she may require for the voyage."
Need I describe the response I made to these kind words, how I clung to him, how I tightened the pleasure girths within, what a glowing reception I gave to his prick as it darted into my quivering cunt, or how he grunted his satisfaction: "Oh, Katie! Oh! Katie, my pet!"
Nina was overjoyed when she heard that she was to have her freedom. She thanked me on her knees and promised to be the most faithful of servants.
Now, dearest May, I have told you more than ever I told anyone else, because I find in you a kindred soul and I want someone to sympathize with me. Don't judge me too harshly; I was little more than a child and alone, my father has been a widower ever since I could remember. Do you love me less?
"No, dearest Kate, I love you a hundred times more for your confidence and affection; but go on and tell me about the voyage and how you first met papa."
"I will dearest; but not to-night. I am tired and sleepy. Kiss me, my love, good night."
(To be continued.)
That interesting old roadside public-house, "The Cock," at Kennington, has lately been redecorated. The sign-post was surmounted by an effigy of Chanticleer, who shone resplendent in new gold-leaf. Enters Mr. Robinson, a neighbouring pawn-broker, who thus addresses the bar-maid: "Your house now looks charming, my dear! Will you tell the painter who gilt your gov'nor's cock to come and gild my balls?" The bar-maid broke a wine-glass in her blushing confusion.
Flunkeyania; or Belgravian Morals. 
It is understood a useful, and it certainly is a commendable, practice, that in bringing a book before the public, the author should say a few words by way of introduction, and of excuse, I presume, for his writing the book at all. But as I have very little to say about my antecedents and even that not of a very exalted or interesting character, I shall plunge at once in medium res, and beg the reader to follow me into the study of the Earl of Pomeroy, who was in the act of investigating my character previously to engaging me in the somewhat anomalous, not to say duplicate, role as his own confidential secretary-valet and body-footman to the Countess.
This, I am aware, is unusual in high families, but it is not without its special utility as I very soon had occasion to find out.
That I had plenty of opportunity offered me of playing the spy, my reader can easily imagine, when I tell him that almost always during the forenoon and generally late in the evening I was in attendance in plain clothes on His Lordship. And in the middle of the day and afternoon dressed in handsome livery, upon the Countess; sometimes at home, sometimes with Her Ladyship's carriage.
That I should give a preference to the service with the lady perhaps was natural, for not only was Her Ladyship's personal attendant, Justine, very pretty, but she showed her admiration for your humble servant in the most distinguished manner.
But moreover, my vanity led me to suppose that my handsome mistress, the Countess, was not altogether insensible to the gratification of being attentively and devotedly waited upon by a good-looking youth, though he might be twenty years old and she thirty at least.
I think we have heard of such things before in the pages of history, dear reader! And I rather fancy we have heard of such charming characters as Catherine of Russia and one or two Queens of Spain!
At any rate, I was not insensible to the advantage of my position, which I was determined to enjoy as long as I could, unless, indeed, anything occurred of so glaring a nature (such as an elopement for instance) that everybody must as a matter of course become aware of it, in which case it would become my duty to His Lordship (and myself) to be beforehand of everybody else and disclose the plot.
But in the meantime, I was pretty certain that my noble mistress was not quite so virtuous as she was beautiful. But when a woman is so charming as she was, a young man is apt to find excuses for her, and I reflect that if a Spanish or an Italian lady has her Cavalier Servente or a French Marchioness has her very particular friend and nobody finds any fault with it, society need not be so very hard on the Countess, if she deviates slightly from the strict line of duty. But, then, you see, my friends, we are such a very moral people! And Society is hard.
One day I particularly remember, I was on duty to attend Her Ladyship who was going to take a short walk (not a very usual habit of hers).
She was, for her, rather plainly dressed and I noticed that the neighbourhood she selected did not seem to me the most appropriate for a lady of title to take the air on foot. But as long as she was not insulted or otherwise inconvenienced that was no business of mine; but presently I considered it my duty to call the Countess's attention to the fact that it was beginning to rain.
"So it is! How provoking!" was my lady's exclamation. But to my natural suggestion that I should call a cab she replied in the negative, telling me that she was only a few doors from the house of a former servant in the family who lived at number so and so. That she would step in and rest. That I should remain at the public house at the corner for half an hour or so and then, if the rain had not ceased, I should bring a cab for her, asking for her nurse, Mrs. Wilson.
Now, the reader will do my intellectual powers injustice if he considers that I did not understand all this thoroughly well. But I only touched my hat respectfully and repaired to the public-house, where, as the rain had not ceased and I thought it a pity to disturb my lady in her interview with her nurse, I remained about an hour and I am bound to say the Countess did not find fault with my delay. I suppose that she must have enjoyed her nurse's society so much indeed. Nor is it to be wondered at that my suspicions were correct and that the said nurse took the shape of a handsome young man and that, reversing the order of things, instead of he nursing her, she nursed her nurse!
It is to be hoped the nursing did her good; but she certainly did not seem much the better for it as she was very quiet and pale, and on arrival home, passed two or three hours on the sofa.
And on another occasion, I was ordered to accompany her on a short drive, when of course, as the brougham was put in requisition, I sat beside the coachman.
We had not gone far, and were still in the neighbourhood of the park, when I noticed a young lady standing on the footpath, as if in expectation of our arrival.
No sooner did my Lady Pomeroy behold her than she pulled the check-rein and ordered me to let in her young friend, Miss Courtney, whom she wished to take for a drive.
Of course I did so with all speed, and a most outrageously affectionate reception inside the carriage Miss Courtney met with, such a desperate kissing and hugging compressed into the space of a half-minute while I was putting in her skirts and shutting the door, I had never seen equalled!
During the transient glimpse I had of their embrace I am almost sure I saw Miss Courtney thrust her tongue most amorously between the Countess's lips, and also take several indescribable liberties with the sacred person of my mistress.
And yet Justine knew something of the science of kissing and hugging too, and had initiated me into, I supposed, every branch of the mystery.
But on this occasion there was something more - a something almost indelicate, by which, taken in combination with other little matters almost as trifling, my attention was excited most curiously.
It will be easily understood by my judicious readers that I was naturally an adept where ladies were concerned, and had in my capacity as a young footman considerably brightened and improved any previous ideas I may have possessed. And, in this case, I was sharp enough to see that though Miss Courtney was well dressed, she was not very well dressed. That is to say, though her clothes were of rich fashionable materials, they looked as if they had not been fitted by a first-class modiste, or put on by a lady's-maid who was up to her business.
Then she did not step into the carriage like a young lady. She grasped the side- handle and sprang in without touching my arm in the first place. In the second place I have noticed that young ladies in getting in and out of a carriage, however modest, and even prudish they may be, are by no means averse to display their pretty ankles and even - well, Excelsior, up higher- a little peep of legs besides.
In fact, I have seen the mossy grotto itself when the drawers happened to favour me.
Well, there is nothing improper in that, and decidedly nothing unpleasant.
But Miss Courtney exhibited her lower limbs up to the knee, making not the slightest attempt to conceal them, and very fine legs they were too - only, somehow - somehow they did not appear to me like young ladies' legs.
There is a marked difference in this respect, I perfectly well know. For example, I may say without vanity that I have a very handsome pair of legs, well - and so has Mademoiselle Justine; but then there is a great difference.
"Of course there is!" I fancy I hear my reader suggesting.
"Come, none of that, sir!" I reply. "I meant as to legs; simply as to legs."
And to return to my subject. The decidedly manly look of the young lady's legs, taken in conjunction with her dress, her style altogether and the peculiar nature of the caresses exchanged between her and the Countess, all these little incidents put together, I repeat, produced strong suspicions in my mind as to the sex of our young passenger.
But I need not have troubled myself to have entertained any suspicions at all. At any rate, they soon became certainties. For presently, I took upon myself to ask Robert the coachman where he was driving? And why was he driving so horribly slow?
To my first enquiry he replied that he was going to drive along St. John's Wood-Road, and in the second place affirmed that he was too compassionate a disposition to two handsome creatures that had never done him harm.
I stared at him, for I presumed he referred to the handsome pair of chestnut horses. But when he followed up his remark by gravely saying that it did not matter at what pace he drove for there was "nobody in the carriage," I thought at first he must be mad or drunk, but on turning my head round, the whole truth flashed upon me at once!
Sure enough, the carriage was supposed to be empty, for all the blinds were closed!
"Don't you know the peephole," said my friend John. "Our coachbuilder made it on purpose to please me, or I ought to say, Lord Pomeroy. He put me up to it and sometimes rides on the box with me and says it's far more pleasure to see his wife fucked by a fine young fellow than to have the trouble to do it himself."
"You don't mean that," I replied.
"Yes, no humbug between ourselves! Old Pom only cares for page-boys, lady's-maids, or some other man's wife or daughters. 'Nothing like breaking the Ten Commandments' is his favourite saying. You'll find that hole in the roof. A little bit slides back just behind you."
Eager to see something of real life, the slide was noiselessly pushed back, till I could see every part of the interior of the brougham. There sat my lady billing and cooing with Miss Courtney. How flushed they looked as their impassioned kisses too plainly told the depth of their feelings.
They were sitting side by side, and the first act of their little love-drama was evidently just over, but the curtain had not yet fallen for the Countess's dress was raised to her navel and I could see the jewelled hand of Miss Courtney groping between her lovely thighs. But that was nothing to the sight of the manly root with which that young lady was furnished at the bottom of her belly, which although rather drooping, was still glistening with the cream of love, as the Countess continued to caress it in her milk-white hand, gently uncovering the fiery-looking red head of her delight, as the motion of her fingers seemed to make a mute appeal to its further gallantry. My curiosity was quite satisfied and we let them enjoy themselves in peace for the rest of the drive.
(To be continued.)
Lady Pokingham, or They All Do It. 
Giving an Account of her Luxurious Adventures, both before and after her Marriage with Lord Crim-Con
My peephole afforded me the sight of many more luscious scenes between Lady Cecilia and her husband before I left town to take up my residence at Hastings for the benefit of my health.
My agent had secured and furnished for me a pretty little detached residence of thirteen or fourteen rooms, surrounded by gardens and orchards, so as to be delightfully free from the prying curiosity of my neighbours.
The household consisted of a cook and housekeeper, both young persons, not exceeding twenty-four or -five years of age, the latter being the daughter of a decayed merchant, a most pleasant and intelligent companion, but up to the time I engaged her, strictly prudish, virtuous.
Being naturally fond of young boys and girls, we had also two very pretty page- boys of about the age of fifteen or sixteen and two beautiful young girls about the same age, instead of housemaid and lady's-maid.
At first I felt considerably enervated by the little excesses I had been a party to, or witnessed, whilst staying with the new Earl, but the soft bracing air of the southern coast soon made me feel more like myself again, and long to indulge in the delicious dalliances of love, to which my warm temperament made me always so inclined.
The result was that I determined to seduce every member of my virgin household, each one of whom I believed to be thoroughly virtuous up to their entering my service.
The two youngest girls, as my special attendants, slept in the next room to mine, and had a door of communication by which the two rooms entered into the other without the necessity of going into the corridor.
I had quite a passion come over me to gamahuche these two pretty young things, and make them thoroughly subservient to my purposes.
You may be sure I was not long in putting my plans in operation as soon as I had sketched them all out in my brain. That very same evening, after my two pretty demoiselles had put the finishing touches to my toilet and left me sitting in my chemise de nuit, in front of a cosy fire with my feet resting on the fender, as I pretended to be reading a thrilling romance.
"Leave that door open, my dears," I said, as they respectfully bid me good night. "I feel so dull perhaps I shall call for you to keep me company, if I feel that I cannot go to sleep."
In a few minutes I heard them tittering and laughing.
"Now, girls," I cried, "come here this moment. I want to know what you are having such fun about. Come just as you are, no putting anything more on or waiting to hide your blushes. Annie! Patty! Do you hear?"
Afraid of making me angry, the two girls came blushing into my room just as they were, in their nightgowns.
"Well now, what is it that is amusing you so?"
"Please, my Lady, it was Patty," said Annie with a wicked look at her companion.
"Ah, no, you fibber! My Lady, it was Annie began it," retorted the other, looking quite abashed.
Nothing could be got out of them, each saying it was the other.
At last I said: "I can guess pretty well what you two girls were amusing yourselves about; now tell me truly, were you looking at each other's privates in the glass?"
This question hit the mark, and seeing how shame-faced and blushing they both were, I went on: "No doubt, examining to see which one showed most signs of hair on her little pussey. Let me see Annie," as I suddenly caught the bottom of her nightdress and in an instant had it reversed over her head, so as to cover up her face and expose all the rest of her beautiful little figure. "Why, the impudent little thing hasn't a hair to boast of! Give her bottom a good slapping, Patty!"
Patty was only too pleased to do it, and the slaps fairly echoed through the room, mingling with Annie's piteous cries to let her go.
My blood was up. The sight of her beautiful bum, all flushed and rosy under the sharply administered slaps, made me fairly lust to take further liberties. So I let the little victim go, whispering in her ear, and her tearful eyes were brightened in a moment. She darted at Patty and sooner than it takes to write was dragging her about the room fully exposed, with her head and arms secured in her reversed night- dress.
I amused myself by slapping poor Patty's pretty posteriors till they were almost black and blue, regardless of her sobbing and crying for mercy.
At last we let her go, and I took her on my lap to kiss away her tears. She soon smiled again and nestled herself to my body quite lovingly. This seemed to make her companion almost jealous as she appealed to me with a flushed face to kiss her also, which I readily did in the most loving manner, and I asked her to fetch a decanter of wine and some glasses from a cabinet, saying I felt so dull and sleepless I must have something to cheer me.
"Ah, my dear lady," exclaimed Patty, kissing me again and again, "you don't know how we all love you and feel for you, being left alone and unhappy. There is nothing we wouldn't do to bring a smile to your pale face."
"Then we'll sleep together and have a romp on the bed. Only mind, you are good girls, and never tell your mistress's doings," I replied, taking a glass of wine, and ordering them to do the same.
A second and a third glass seemed to open their eyes immensely; the least touch or joke sent them into fits of laughter. They blushed and seemed quite excited. In fact Patty, who had remained on my knee, was almost ready to faint with emotion as she caressed my face and bosom, the cause being a hand I had managed to slip under her nightdress, so that one finger had been tickling and playing with her almost hairless slit and gradually working her up to a state of excitement she was at a loss to comprehend.
"Let us all be naked. Throw off every rag, my dear ones, I want to feel your soft warm flesh next to mine, to cuddle you and feel you all over. Shall I read a pretty little piece of poetry about a potter who married your namesake, Patty?" I said, and seeing they were ready for anything, told Annie to bring me a manuscript called "The Haunted House" from a drawer in the cabinet.
"Now listen to 'The Tale of a Potter' and don't laugh till it is finished. You will find it rather free but nothing more than big girls like you ought to know." Then I commenced:
Young Hodge, he was a worthy wise,
A potter he by trade;
He fell in love with Martha Price,
She was a parson's maid.
This Hodge worked amongst his pans,
His pots, his mugs, his delf;
He said: "A sad fate is a man's
When he is by himself.
Now soon I'll marry Martha Price,
A nice snug home I've got;
The parson soon the knot shall splice,
And we'll both piss in one pot."
Then Hodge he made a pretty pot,
And took it to his love;
Said he: "I've brought this pot to show,
I mean your love to prove.
Now name the day, the happy day,
Whose night shall bring me bliss;
When your sweet cunt and my stiff prick
Shall mingle in this their piss."
They married were within a week,
And Hodge he was in luck;
He took sweet Patty's maidenhead
With his first vigorous fuck.
Then in her arms he fell asleep,
But started with affright;
And in the middle of the bed
He sat up bold and white.
"Oh, love! oh, love! I've had a dream,
A dream to cause me fright;
I dreamed we both were in my shop
And there I hugged you tight.
I dreamed I went your cheek to kiss,
We romped with hugs and squeezes;
When down I knocked the pots and pans
And broke them all in pieces."
Then Martha answered with a laugh:
"No pots you've broke, good man;
But much I fear this very night,
You've cracked a Patty Pan."
And from that night unto this day
Hodge in that crack would pop,
A prick as thick as any brick,
But the crack he cannot stop.
So maids beware, heed well your pans.
With this my tale is ended;
If your pan's cracked by prick of man,
It never can be mended.
Throwing down the manuscript, I had a finger in each of their cracks sooner than it takes to write. "What darling little pans each of you has! I long to throw you on the bed and kiss them. What do you think of mine with its soft curly hair? Only it's a broken pan, you know, my dears, as I've of course had my husband."
"La, and was that really so nice, dear lady? Oh, I love you so, do let me look," exclaimed Patty, slipping off my knee and kneeling between my legs to get a better sight of the object of her curiosity, which she first kissed most lovingly, and then, parting the hair, put a couple of fingers light up my cunt. This so tickled and delighted me that I leant back in the chair and pulled Annie close to my bosom as I hugged and kissed her, whilst I still had a finger in her little slit, as far as it would go. My legs also mechanically opened to facilitate inspection, as Patty exclaimed, "How deep my two fingers can go right up and it is so warm and moist. It makes me feel I could eat it!"
In a few minutes we were all tossing on my bed in a state of nature. They laughed, screamed and blushed as I excitedly examined and kissed their respective cunnies. How my tongue revelled around their budding clitorises till they rewarded me with those first virgin emissions which are always so deliciously thick and creamy. How lovingly they both repaid all my caresses, Patty paying the most ardent attentions to my cunt, which delighted her more and more every moment, whilst Annie seemed to prefer sucking my bubbies as I gamahuched her.
"What a treat it would be to see you both lose your maidenheads at once," I exclaimed.
"Ah! couldn't the pages do it for us, dear lady? I do love that Charlie so!" appealed Patty without consideration in her excitement.
"I'll try and manage it; but we must be careful not to let them into our secrets before I can find out how they are disposed," I replied.
"Oh, I know Charlie is a rude, bold little fellow, wicked enough for anything if he had the chance. What do you think, I once actually caught him handling his affair in the pantry when he thought no one was looking and when I happened to enter suddenly; it was sticking out straight and red-looking at the top. His face was quite red and he seemed rather short of breath; but the impudent fellow, like the dare-devil he is, shook it fairly in my face as he asked me to give him a kiss, saying: 'What do you think of this, Patty? That's how it gets, when' - oh, mistress I can't tell you all he said."
But I pressed her and at last she told me: "It was when we had been waiting on his mistress. 'Oh, Patty,' he said, isn't she lovely, such mouth and teeth and loving eyes, I feel as if I could jump at her, I do!'"
"Very well, Master Charlie," I laughed, "perhaps I shouldn't so much mind if you did, when we are alone someday I will give him the chance and let you two dears know all about it. But I will first read you another song from 'The Haunted House' and to-morrow I will give you a copy, and I expect both to be able to sing it soon."
"LIVE AND LEARN." Tune:- Drops of Brandy
When I was little and good,
A long time ago 'm afraid, Miss;
A stiff prick was not understood,
I was a quiet little, shy little maid, Miss.
I knew but one use for my cunt,
I knew not what joy 'twould afford me.
The sight of a cock would affront,
And talk about fucking have bored me.
But now, oh, much wiser I've grown!
I'll stretch my legs open for any,
My modest shy feelings have flown.
And fucks, why, I can't get too many!
I like a stiff prick up my arse.
Though too much of that makes you bandy.
When I look at my quim in the glass,
It always pouts red and looks randy.
I like a fuck - morn, noon, and night,
On every weekday and Sunday:
If I'm fucked on the Sabbath, all right!
But I want to be buggered on Monday.
Oh! Let it be hot or be cold,
I'm always alive for a cock, Miss;
Men, fair, dark, young or old,
Here's a hole that'll take in their jock, Miss!
I can spend for an hour at a time.
My cunt is as hot as fire, Sir;
The man that says: "Fucking is crime,"
I say to his face, he's a liar, Sir.
Then give me a prick in each hand,
Turn my arse north, my cunt to the south;
And get an your jocks well to stand,
One in each hole and one in my mouth;
I'll fuck and I'll suck and I'll frig,
Until you're all quite bloody well spent, Sir!
Then I'll take in the lodgers again,
And never once ask them for rent, Sir!
Hurrah! for my cunt, my best friend.
Hurrah! for a cock to kiss, Sir;
I'll fuck till this life comes to end,
I hope too, there's fucking in bliss, Sir!"
When we awoke in the morning it was too late for a repetition of our tribadism, so I made them get up quickly and bring in breakfast, promising to look after Master Charlie during the day.
(To be continued.)
Overheard at the Aquarium. 
Swell.- "Damn it! all the same flaghopping faces, not a fresh bit of cunt here, I'd give anything if I could fuck the Princess Amuzulu, and bugger the "Old Man of the Woods!"
Just as we were going to press an anonymous correspondent in board Admiral Seymour's ship at Ragusa has favoured the editor with the following:
Who'll bugger the Turk?
"I," said Gladstone, "as Chief of the Nation,
And Premier of England, to gain reputation.
I'll bugger the Turk,
And ne'er let him shirk
My prick's Grand Demonstration!"