The Pearl/Volume 8/Fables and Maxims.

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1437339The Pearl — Fables and Maxims.Printed for the Society of Vice

The Lady and the Eel.

A young lady was frigging herself with a small live eel, when it slipped from her fingers and disappeared in her cunt; making its way into the womb, it entered, and stretching out its head said, "I am much obliged to you Madam, for finding me so warm and comfortable a residence; I shall make myself quite at home." This fable teaches how much better it is to use large eels which could not enter.

The Discontented Crab.

A crab who had for some time lived very happily on the person of a very dirty whore, one day became discontented. "How much nicer would it be to live with some cleaner and more reputable person," he thought, so watching his opportunity he effected his escape on to the person of a well-dressed and delicately clean young gentleman. "This," said the crab, "is something like," but to his disgust the gentleman took a warm bath after leaving his late mistress, and spying him out cracked him.

This fable conveys two morals. First, one should always leave well alone; secondly, a dirty person is very much nicer than a clean one (to crabs).