Page:Every Woman's Encyclopedia Volume 1.djvu/62

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MARRIAGE Marriage plays a verv important part in every woman's life and, on account oi its universal interest In/importance, will be dealt with fully in Every Woman's Encyclopaedia The subject has two sides, the practical and the romantic. A varied range ot articles, therefore, will be included in this section, dealing with : j Marriage Customs The Ceremony Honeymoons Bridesmaids Groomsmen • Engagements j Weddmg Superstitions I Marriage Statistics Trousseaux Colonial Marriages Foreign Marriages Encasement and Wedding Rings, etc. MARRIAGE By "MADGE" (Mrs. HUMPHRY) M^ ARRiAGE is a topic SO treiTiendous that even the pen seems to hesitate in the fingers before venturing upon it. One often reads that marriage is the most momentous event in a woman's life. Indeed, looked at in advance, through girlhood and young womanhood, it certainly looms large, and is the goal to which the majority of girls look forward. Moreover, to wish for a home of their own. and to make some " dear-loved lad ' happy in it, is to them as natural as is nest-making to birds in sprin-rtirce. THE DESIRE TO PLEASE This, however, is a very different thing from husband-hunting. Mr. Bernard Shaw and some other men appear to imagine that the object of •very girl's existence is to pursue and captare a mate. This, however, is not the case. Nature has bestowed upon womankind a desire to please, a vanit> which is not a fault when kept within the bounds of moderation ; and, in some cases, an innate coquetry that displays itself at a remarkably early age. Noting this armour for the subjugation of man, the male observer has naturally inferred a deliberate attack upon his liberty, a resolute determination to conquer. But, as a matter of fact, the average girl is innocent of anything other than a desire to please, a love of admiration, and a happy enjoyment of complimentary remarks. Her attitude towaras men is not that of the huntress, but that of the spectator interested in an amusing game which at any minute she may be called upon to join. Men seldom do justice to the innocence of a girl's thoughts about love and marriage. They attribute to her not only the man- hunting propensity, but ideas and feelings which very few young women entertain. There is a Virginal delicacy in the heart and mind of the ordinary girl, and this can be appreciated only by those of the other sex who are pure-minded and fine of nature. THE MORAL STANDARD OF MAN There are many such men ; we have it on excellent authority, that of Dr. Winnington Ingram, Bishop of London, and it is one of the happiest characteristics of the present age that there is a large number of young men with a high moral standard, whose ideal of life is star-high compared with that of their predecessors of but one generation ago. We had ancestors who seldom went sober to bed, and who thought every village girl, every dressmaker's assistant, a lawful prey. It is to such men as these — the two-bottle men, the dissipated ones — that women owe the poor place they occupy even now in the estimation of many. WHEN LOVE COMES Mothers ought to prepare their girls in some way against the onslaught of love. It is so insidious in its approach, so overwhelm- ing when it seizes a victim, so utterly different from any previous experience, that a girl is often hard put to it to conceal her preference. When a man falls in love, however, he is at liberty to take the whole world into his confidence. Indeed, he often does, and the poets of old have represented him as " sighing like a furnace."