Page:Every Woman's Encyclopedia Volume 1.djvu/63

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45 The poor girl, however, must not sigh. She has been taught that to show a preference for any man before he has shown a decided one for her is to be unmaidenly. Moreover, even without such teaching she is aware that to display any such inclination would result in much humiliation for herself if the man were not to reciprocate the sentiment. Sometimes, out of pure anxiety to hide her feeling, she snubs the unfortunate man so effectually that he, much wounded in his pride, turns his thoughts to another girl, whom he woos and wins. Life is full of such heart-wearing episodes, and novelists and playwrights could not live without them. A ROSY DAWN There is a delightful time that comes before a definite word is spoken between the two whom mutual inclination draws together. It is like the rosy flush of dawn before the sunrise. Each knows that the other is attracted, and has a confident anticipation of happiness to come. It is a time of expectant waiting when the two are reverent to each other and to the beautiful sense of love. There is about it a soft vagueness which, like a light morning mist, enhances the exquisite charm of the atmosphere. THE SUNRISE Then comes the word that crystallises and concentrates the tumultuous sensations. The sun has risen, and brought with it sharp effects of light and shadow. The beautifying mists are gone, and even the MARRIAQI happiest girl, her promise given, feels some vague sense of faint regret for a moment which never can recur. It is the same kind of feeling that makes her. if truly in love, wish to delay speaking of her engagement, even to her nearest. To talk of a thing so sacred, she feels, takes some of the bloom off it. Like Mary of the Bible story, she would like to ponder these things in her heart. The actual, the real, however, steps in, and the ideal has to retreat before it. Worldly wisdom sometimes sets itself against young love, and often it is justifi 1 in doing so. The two so irresistibly attracted to eu i other cannot stay to consider such trifling things as inequality of rank, insufficiency of means, some hereditary taint of constitu- tion, difference of religion, or other rocks in the stream that prevent the course of true love from running smoothly. To be precipitate, therefore, in announcing an engagement to one's circle of acquaintance is a mistake, unless fair weather is likely to attend the journey to the wedding. Who has not seen in the columns of the Morning Post " or the " Court Journal " an announcement to the eifect that " the marriage arranged between Miss Such-an-onc and Mr. So-and-so will not take place " ? Many a girl has regretted that her engage- ment should have been made public before the wishes of both families had been fully ascertained, or ample inquiry made into the circumstances of her fiance and his previous life. the Church OF THE ETIQUETTE MARRIAGE Announcing the Engagement — Preparations for the Wedding — Presents — In Bridesmaids— The Reception— The Best Man— Going Away " A marriage has been arranged between Captain Whyte. 2nd Fusiliers, son of Sii Robert Whyte. of Greylands. and Miss T HERE are two things to be done when an engagement has been made, and ratified by the families of the two persons who have promised themselves each to the other. One of these two things concerns the bridegroom. He has to take the measure of his lady's finger and buy the engagement ring. The other is to write to his relatives and tell them the news. These letters should all be sent by the same post. Nothing annoys aunts, uncles, and cousins more than to think that some other member of the family has been told of the engagement before them. No one should be forgotten. All very intimate friends should be informed of the event at the same time. The bride writes to her own friends and her mother to the elder ones. There is no formaUty about such letters. They simply convey the news and are usually answered very soon, the replies being more or less rongratulatory. When the family is of good social position, the announcement is sent to the "Morning Post " and the " Court Journal," in the well-known formula : Dorothy Browne, elder daughter of Mr. Arthur Greene-Browne, of The Towers. Fifeshire, and 200. Bclgrave Square." The bride's family send out this announce- ment, and friends and acquaintances, seeing it in the paper, write their congratulations. Sometimes the date of the marriage is included in this published announcement. " A marriage is arranged and will take place on November 12th." etc., etc. It is hardly necessary to remark that undue haste in announcing the engagement would be a great mistake; and, above all things, the approval of the bridegroom's parents should be gained before even announcing the betrothal to one's friends. It is usual to give a dinner or evening party at which the engagement is an- nounced. This is done before any news- paper paragraph appears on the subject. Ihe relatives on both sides arc invited, as well as the friends of the host and hostess, and perhaps some of the bridegroom's as well.