to this law, and should seal its truth with my blood and my tears. My blood is dried up in my veins at the spectacle of the world's corruption; as to my tears, they do not fall from my eyes (my strong constitution forbids me to weep), but they sink within my heart.
XLI.
I ask myself why I am so ardently impressed with the meaning of the primitive commandment, amid all the cares and troubles that surround my life. Will the world give me credit for all the griefs that I endure? Will I receive, for this discovery which is of interest to all the world, a reward such as they give to inventors of trifles? It is useless to think of such a thing. My greatest recompense will consist in escaping punishment; for their attacks upon me are vigorous. But against whom are they directed? Reflect on this important question. Why should these menaces disquiet me, when I am guided by an invisible and mysterious hand, which impels me to act as I do, so that it is, as it were, against my will that I labor.
XLII.
Formerly I hoped to obtain from God in a future life, some reward for this work, although I have not accomplished it perfectly. And now well-educated men, understanding the object I sought, say to me: "You have not labored for love of your neighbor, but for love of yourself. To love your neighbor and at the same time to love yourself is to offend God and to hate your neighbor." Their arguments seem to me pure and simple truth; one would think God had inspired their words.
