Page:The London Magazine, volume 7 (January–June 1823).djvu/517

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1823.]
Two Masters for One Dog.
499

dress. “Look!” said she; “why, like a king baked in gingerbread. Ah! now, such a man as you is the man for my money:—stout, and resolute, and active, and a man that——

“Basta! sufficit, my dear.”

“To be sure, for his professional merit, I must’nt say any thing against the late Mr. Sweetbread: No, nobody must say any thing against that: he was the man for slaughtering of swine; Oh! he slaughtered them, that it was beautiful to see! pigs in particular, and pigs in general, were what he understood. Ah! lord! to my dying day I shall never forget the great sow that he presented to our gracious princess when she was at the baths, two years come Michaelmas. Says her Highness to him,” says she,—‘Master,’ says she, ‘one may see by your look that you understand how to fatten: any body,’ says she, ‘may see it in his face: a child may see it by the very look on him.’ ‘Ah!’ says her Highness, ‘he’s the man for swine: he was born to converse with hogs: he’s a heaven-born curer of bacon.’—Lord! Mr. Schnackenberger, you’ll not believe how these gracious words revived my very heart! The tears came into my eyes, and I couldn’t speak for joy. But, when all’s said and done, what’s fame? what’s glory? say I. A man like you is the man for me: but for such another lazy old night-cap as the late Mr. Sweetbread——

“Bah! sufficit, sweetheart;” at the same time squeezing her hand, which she took as an intimation that she ought not to trouble herself with the past, but rather look forward to a joyous futurity.

As the hour drew near for presenting himself in the circle of the princess, Mr. Jeremiah recommended to her the most vigilant care of Juno, from whom he very unwillingly separated himself in these last days of their connexion—and not until he had satisfied himself that it was absolutely impossible to take her with him to the ball. Another favourite, namely, his pipe, ought also, he feared, in strict propriety to be left behind. But in the first place, “who knows,” thought he, “but there may be one room reserved for such ladies and gentlemen as choose to smoke?” And, secondly, let that be as it might, he considered that the great meerschaum[1] head of his pipe—over which he watched as over the apple of his eye—could no where be so safely preserved as in his own pocket: as to any protuberance that it might occasion, that he valued not at a rush. Just as little did he care for the grotesque appearance of the mouth-piece, which in true journeyman’s fashion stuck out from the opening of his capacious pocket to a considerable distance.

“And now don’t you go and forget some people in the midst of all this show of powdered puppies,” cried the landlady after him.

“Ah! my darling!” said he, laughing, “just mind Juno: have an eye to Juno, my darling;” and for Juno’s sake he suppressed the “old witch,” that his lips were itching a second time to be delivered of.

CHAPTER VII.

Mr. Schnackenberger is enamoured, and of whom; and what Prospects open upon him in his Pursuit of La Belle Passion.

At the hotel of the princess, all the resources of good taste and hospitality were called forth to give éclat to the fête, and do honour to the day; and by ten o’clock, a very numerous and brilliant company had already assembled.

So much the more astounding must have been the entry of Mr. Jeremiah Schnackenberger; who, by the way, was already familiar to the eyes of many, from his very public entrance into the city on the preceding evening, and to others from his morning’s exhibition on the golden sow. His eyes and his thoughts being occupied by the single image of the fascinating hostess, of course


  1. Meerschaum:” I believe a particular kind of clay, called “sea-spray,” from its fineness and lightness, from which the boles of pipes are made in Turkey—often at enormous prices, and much imported into Germany, where they are in great request. Such is the extent of my knowledge on the subject; or perhaps of my ignorance. But, in fact, I know nothing about it.