Artabanzanus/Chapter 12
CHAPTER XII.
THE COURT OF A GRAND POTENTATE.
As we finished our frugal breakfast next morning, the Doctor, who seemed to be one of the most abstemious of men, although much stouter and heavier than I, ordered Florian to send his carriage to the door.
'Let the carriage be a strong one,' he said, 'and as the distance is considerable let us have four horses.'
'Yes.' Did he mean to take me with him, then?
'I am going to visit two old acquaintances of mine, whom I dare say you will recognise when I introduce you to them. I shall be glad of your company, but if you prefer remaining here——'
'I submit myself entirely to your guidance, Doctor,' I replied. We went out into the street and waited until the carriage came round. The street was narrow and rather dark, having but few lamps in it. Many people passed by, but there was no coarse laughter or pretended joy among them. The majority of these were evidently labouring under an accumulation of diseases, and many addressed the Doctor, imploring him to cure their complaints. His general reply was: 'I cannot cure you, I can only alleviate your pains; go round to the dispensary, Doctor Mancus and the apothecaries are there.'
'These people,' said he, addressing me, 'think I can do everything, whereas I can do but very little compared with what requires to be done. Their diseases are the results of their own, or their forefathers', wickedness and impenitence. There are men who cannot learn anything by their own or anyone else's experience; they think but little of health, the greatest blessing it is possible for a human being to enjoy.'
'Do they remain here for ever, Doctor?' I asked with some timidity.
'That I am not permitted to tell you,' he curtly answered.
The carriage now came to the door, and we took our seats. It was a heavy vehicle, drawn by four spirited, impatient horses. The Doctor took the reins from a smartly-dressed groom, who climbed up and seated himself beside another, and away we dashed. The street led us into the great square where the fatal battle had been fought. I recognised it by its tall columns to Glory, Victory, Patriotism, and so on, and by the crimson pool in the centre of the so-called Royal Park. What sad emotions, what bitter pangs, for fallen miserable men passed through my heart. We drove on rapidly out into the vast abyss, and straight on to the opposite side. On the way we skirted what appeared to be a large, gray, cloudy-looking rock, but we found, on approaching nearer to it, that it was the lightning balloon, lying prostrate and motionless on the earth, waiting its owner's time for his next important flight. Its hideous driver was there, pottering about, arranging portions of its gear and tackling, hauling on ropes, tightening screws, and hammering bolts here and there. He was singing, or rather shrieking, a most extraordinary song, which sounded in my ears like the filing of a dozen cross-cut saws, mingled with the beating of half a dozen tin kettles, and the hoarse braying of a jackass. The refrain of the song was rather difficult to catch, as the carriage and horses made great noise, but I managed to secure the following valuable fragment, which I give with many apologies:
'Strike! Strike! Strike!
And wait till the devils come down.
Strike! Strike! Strike!
And away to Pandapolis Town, ho! ho!
For here we strike up, up, up!
And there we strike down, down, down!
And now we strike for'arder,
And now we strike back'arder,
And hurrah for Pandapolis Town, ho! ho!
The Doctor pulled up his horses, and the balloon driver stopped his song.
'Well Obeltub,' said the former, 'how are you getting on? How do you find yourself today, my dear and respected old friend? Getting ready for your next journey, I see. Rejoice, thou honourable pilot, I'm going with you, my boy!'
Obeltub grinned frightfully, and grunted in a very jocular manner, expressive, I thought, of derision and incredulity.
'Fact, 'pon my honour,' resumed the Doctor; 'I've made it all right. Your master is going to take me at last; he will keep his promise this time, and be as true, and generous, and faithful as you are yourself. So pump up a grand supply of lightning, stow away plenty of thunder, put in a lot of old moons for ballast, and have two of your fastest comets ready in tandem!'
Obeltub growled terribly, and scowled as who should say, 'I take no orders from you; be off, or it will be the worse for you.' He did not come within my friend's jurisdiction.
'And I shall not forget, my boy,' said he, laughing, and with difficulty suppressing a roar, 'to bring you a clothes-brush and a comb, and a bottle of scented oil for your hair and a tooth-brush, and a pot of my patent paste, and a splendid hog, a prime barbecue stuffed with toads devilled for your dinner.'
The driver, who was in no humour to be the Doctor's butt, snarled like an enraged hyaena, and seizing a sledge-hammer which lay near him, he ran at full speed after our carriage. The Doctor roared 'Shatter me to bits if he's not going to strike!' then whistled to his horses, which flew away like the wind, and turning round he burst into a loud, ringing laugh in which I could not help joining.
We soon entered another of the gigantic arches. The scene that now lay before us differed materially from the other two of which I had had recent and painful experience. An apparently large, but very gloomy suburb received us into its inmost recesses. It was crowded with innumerable small houses, or rather huts; amongst them, rising at intervals, stood tall buildings, evidently devoted to grave and serious business. They were of all possible shapes, and were built of lead; many, of very large size, were the residences of rich people. This leaden city was thronged with inhabitants, who might be divided into two classes—those who rushed through the streets with breakneck speed, overturning and trampling on everything in their way; and those who sauntered about listlessly, with downcast eyes, looking from under their eyebrows as we dashed along, glaring furtively with stony glances. The former class seemed to have only one object in view; they hurried constantly in and out of the large business houses like swarms of bees. The latter class looked upon them with envy and jealousy. I asked the Doctor what people they were, and why they were in that place.
It was a long time before he answered my question, for he was absorbed in gloomy, perhaps in bitter, reflections. The unhappy aspect of the inhabitants by whom we were surrounded was certainly not calculated to engender pleasant or cheerful thoughts. They wore their own hair, but their eyes were like balls of stone. Their features bore the sad traces of deep and unavailing regret. They talked with each other in low, muttering whispers; and I saw that each one carried a heavy roll of lead, some greater, some less, across his shoulders.
At length the Doctor spoke.
'You have asked me, Ubertus, who these people are, and why they are here? My answer is, I do not know who they are, and I can only guess why they are here. It is not for us to judge them, but the same Voice which told us not to judge lest we should be judged, told us also, "By their fruits ye shall know them." These people whom you see wonderful as it may appear, are not real people of flesh and blood, but only shadows. If you hear them speak and tell their adventures, that fact you may refer back to your own imagination, and your knowledge of the past. But they shadow forth what punishments may be in store, in the dreadful future, for those worldly and unprincipled men who make the grandeur, the glory the riches, the power and the pleasures of this world the sole objects of the their desire and ambition. We are told that there is eternal fire for those who will not worship, or acknowledge, God. Here there is no appearance of fire except the lamps in the streets; but the fires burn, nevertheless, in the hearts of these shadows—fires of sorrow and remorse for the priceless time which they wasted and lost in their insatiable grovelling for earth's glittering treasures; fires of pain and anguish when they find themselves shut out from the presence of God and His holy angels. And I tell you that it would be well for some millions of human beings if they could annihilate themselves entirely from the bosom of the universe. How many among us have thought that by laying violent hands on ourselves in our despair we could escape from the power and the wrath of the Almighty! What fools, what madmen they were to rush with their eyes open, and all their sense about them, into that mysterious Presence!'
At that moment a grand building, which I was told was a bank doing an immense business, suddenly fell with a tremendous crash, burying thousands of the unhappy people in its ruins. The scramble on all sides was terrific; the surrounding houses were crushed, and many of the large edifices at a distance trembled visibly. My companion did not seem to be much affected by this awful calamity. He merely chirruped his horses, and observed that such things were to be expected with houses built of lead.
Then he quietly resumed his former conversation. 'I am of opinion that the man who deprives himself of the life which God gave him is, for the time being, helplessly insane. Whether his madness be brought on by his own folly or wickedness, or by the folly and wickedness of others, he is mad.'
'You are right, I think, Doctor,' I answered; 'it is a charitable view to take, and I take it with all my heart. The Divine Author of our existence is doubtless a merciful Being, if we do not provoke His indignation beyond the possibility of forgiveness. Even when these people, whether shadow or substance, are suffering a punishment like this, they must in truth acknowledge that they deserve it. They were commanded, lovingly entreated, solemnly warned, yet they persevered in their own way, and at last they died in their sins. Was it not so?'
'You speak truly and wisely; these men whom you see around us were misers, worshippers of silver and gold, of wealth in all its seductive forms of worldly splendour, worshippers of a little brief authority and power, and tyrants over their fellow-creatures. Proud, haughty, arrogant, and unapproachable, many of them were: worshippers of themselves and their wealth, they drank to the dregs the cup offered to them by their god, the mammon of the world. Look at them now, and look at their dwellings; but here we are at our destination.'
Leaden walls with huge gates surrounded a great palace, standing in a garden in which were small offices and arbours, and statues of lead and black marble. The gates opened and admitted us into a courtyard, and several officers and servants dressed in mourning came forward. They seemed to know the Doctor, for they saluted him respectfully, but at me they stared in vacant surprise, while some of them, with strange significance, placed their hands upon their necks.
The Doctor told the principal officer that he wished to see his Majesty and his Eminence, and to introduce a distinguished visitor, if permitted so to do. The officer sent a subordinate to inquire the pleasure of these great personages, who returned in a short time with an invitation for us to enter the palace.
We were shown in by the grand entrance, and found ourselves in a large hall; then we passed through a vestibule, and into a corridor that led us into a picture-gallery, from which we emerged into what appeared to be a chapel, with a great organ, and some hundreds of kneeing figures. Communicating with this was an antechamber, also crowded with people, who were not kneeling. The gentlemen-in-waiting bowed to the Doctor, and looked suspiciously on me. One knocked at a large door, which he, on a signal from within, opened wide, and we entered the apartment.
It was a tolerably large one, surrounded with book-cases, but as the light was defective I could not see whether there were books on the shelves or not. At one end of a long table covered with papers and parchments sat an elderly gentleman, on whose shoulders hung negligently a scarlet robe. His face was quite yellow, his hair white, and his eyes were heavy and leaden gray. He rose from his seat when the Doctor was announced and extended his hand. The Doctor treated him with great respect, and introduced me thus:
'Permit me to introduce my friend, Mr. Oliver Ubertus, to your Eminence—Ubertus, His Eminence Cardinal——'
I bowed low, and started back in astonishment—Cardinal!
'Who is Mr. Oliver Ubertus, sir? To whom have I the honour of being introduced?' inquired the Cardinal in a soft and mellow voice.
The Doctor gave him my history briefly, as I had given it to him in a previous interview.
The Cardinal was then pleased to say that he was himself glad to see us, but if Dr. Julius wished to introduce Mr. Ubertus to the King, he was not in a position to inform us whether his Majesty would grant us an interview. His Majesty was holding his Court of Justice just then, and was in a very peculiar humour indeed. 'However,' he added, 'I will myself go and inquire: be seated, gentlemen!'
He retired by a small door, which opened silently into a dark passage, and after an absence of about ten minutes returned saying that his Majesty, although slightly unwell, would graciously condescend to receive us. We followed his Eminence through dark and tortuous passages, which red to lead to the secret dungeons of the grave, and entered, in a blaze of light, into the magnificent throne-room of the King, who sat in state on his leaden throne, surrounded by lords, great officers, halberdiers, buffetiers, leaden sticks-in-waiting, and secretaries.
There was no mistaking that formidable monarch. The frown on his brow, and the fierce glare of his bloodshot eyes filled me with fear and horror, and I wept inwardly at the sad history of my glorious country. To add to my grief and consternation, the Doctor pressed my arm, and directed my attention to a number of savage-looking men who were ranged along one side of the room, each with a black block before him, and a sharp axe by his side. The King was silent as the Cardinal approached him, and, bowing low, announced that the appointed hour for the execution of some of his Majesty's enemies—traitors to their country—was come.
The King answered: 'Ha! then let them die!'
In obedience to this mandate, the traitors were brought in strongly guarded. Their names are familiar to all readers of history I must not mention them here. I saw their heads rolling on the floor, but no blood appeared to follow them. Shylock here might have had his pound of flesh— if flesh there were—without a single drop of blood breaking his bond.
When the executions were over, and the bodies of the victims had been removed, I noticed a flutter and commotion in the room. A side door opened, and a number of ladies entered in solemn procession. They took their seats on each side of the King. They were clothed in black robes, and had crowns on their heads, and of the six who were thus seated, two had scarlet rings round their necks. A dead silence reigned in the hall and wondered why the Doctor had taken me there, as he well knew how abhorrent to me were scenes of blood, but I conjectured that he had some serious object in view. The King rose from his throne, and seemed to be absorbed by some mental agony. 'The women I have loved,' he murmured, 'and two of them died under the headsmen; it was too bloody—I was a monster, and I ask their forgiveness.' The Queens rose from their seats and knelt before him, and then they all resumed their seats.
Several serious cases were now brought up for judgment, poor against rich, and rich against poor. The covetous and unjust rich were punished by being condemned to wander about for certain seasons with rolls of lead on their backs. How some seditious people were dealt with will appear from the following:
Ten strong, healthy-looking men were led in handcuffed to each other, and their accuser stood beside them. They were, he said, men belonging to the labouring class, men whose station in life was appointed by the Supreme Governor of the world, men who might be happy and contented if they would be so, and allow others to be so, but they would not. They had plenty of work, were paid fair wages, were kindly treated by their employers, all their complaints were listened to, and, if reasonable, promptly redressed; but they were not satisfied. They said Capital had no right to rule over them; they would be dictators and masters over their employers. They struck work, and formed themselves into impracticable and tyrannical combinations; harangued their fellow-workmen, and made them as rebellious as themselves; and left their wives and children in pitiable privation, alarm, and anxiety. They were disturbers of the social peace, and destroyers of the happiness and prosperity of the community.
The King asked the men if these charges were true; they were silent; they, who had been so eloquent and bombastic on their oratorical tubs, had now not a word to say. His Majesty then commanded that they should work in the lead marble mines during his pleasure.
'My lord Cardinal,' said the King, when these trials were over, 'we would hear thee speak. We are told thou hast been on a visit to another world.'
'The visit of which your Majesty has heard,' answered the Cardinal, 'was an involuntary, and I believe a spiritual, one. Whether it occurred to me during sleep, or I was carried up by one of those powerful genii of whom your Majesty has heard, I do not know. I was upborne into the regions of upper air, into the dazzling light of a warm summer's day, and set down, after a long journey over mountains and through clouds, beside a heavenly lake of delicious water, surrounded by magnificent woods and hills. It was the Field of the Cloth of Gold, bereft of its decorations of art. I saw trees growing tall and stately under a blue sky, and green grass and flowers under my feet, and rocks and ornaments of nature a thousand times more beautiful to me than the sapphires and diamonds of this wretched place. Then by degrees, as my eyes could bear them, I saw sheep, horses, and cattle grazing on the hills; and as I travelled on without a guide through this splendid country, not knowing whither I was going, I saw a multitude of roads leading in all directions, some parallel with each other, and some crossing each other at all kinds of angles. They took up nearly the whole of the land, so that there was scarcely any room for gardens or meadows, or houses in which men might live. And I saw that a vast number of these roads had parallel lines of iron upon them, and every hour or so a long string of curious looking coaches would come rushing past me, suddenly appearing on one side and disappearing on the other, rolling on with a thundering sound, the horses flying so fast that I could not see them. I walked on and on in ever-increasing astonishment until I came to a large city, but it seemed only the ghost of a city. It had evidently been once rich and populous, but now had all the appearance of having been ruined by the wasteful extravagance of its inhabitants, or by the spoliations of a foreign enemy; but the coaches on their iron roads came in constantly snorting and whistling, bringing nothing or next to nothing. I wondered exceedingly what became of all the horses which must have drawn them, but concluded that they must have stables for them underground. Some of the coaches were kitchens doubtless, for they had boilers for cooking purposes, with fires and chimneys. And I saw an immense building, nearly in the centre of the city, with a great crowd of poor, unhappy-looking people surrounding it, and crying, "Bring them out ! bring them out!" and lo! the doors were opened, and forth issued a number of ragged men, torn and bleeding; and each one had a long strap round his waist, at the end of which was fastened a kettle made of tin. And these poor men were immediately hunted through the streets, pelted with mud, and barbarously maltreated by the savage populace, until I pitied them and wept for their sufferings. Then I asked a bystander, who seemed to pity them too, who they were and what had they done. "They are our wicked woolgrowers and owners of land," said he with a frown, "who have ruined us, and swallowed up all our money." Then, sire, I was led down to the shore of a beautiful lake, whose waters were as salt as the ocean, and saw under the surface the black skeletons of hundreds of ships which had carried away the gold of that country, and brought back its merchandize and luxuries; and, behold, I heard a loud voice issuing from the heart of a great mountain which overlooked the city, saying: This is the land that trusted in the glory and power of its richest! And please, your Majesty, I remember no more.'
'Very remarkable; you have remembered more than enough, I think,' said the mighty monarch. 'Where is that country?'
'I know no more than you do, sir,' replied the Cardinal.
'Is there no one here who can tell us where that strange country is?' shouted the King in rising wrath.
Here is a gentleman, please your Majesty,' said the Doctor, dragging me forward against my will, 'who can tell you all about it. He is just come from the very place. Mr. Oliver Ubertus, your humble and devoted subject—ahem!—and hopes your Majesty will be merciful to him, and not cut his head off this time.'
'That will be as he deserves,' replied the King. 'Come forward thou, Oliver U. Burstus, if that is thy name, and tell our Court what thou knowest of that strange land. Keep away from him, Doctor Julius; thou wilt prompt him; we know thy tricks and magic arts. Come to us anon: we would learn something of our precious body. Speak, man Ubustus; where dost thou come from?'
'From Tasmania, sire,' I answered, trembling from head to foot.'
'Where is that?'
'An island in the South Pacific Ocean.'
'An island of cannibals, ha!'
'No, sire—an island of most civilized and respectable people.'
'Proceed, and be brief; explain what thou heardest fall from the lips of our minister the Cardinal.'
'Sir, I am but ill-fitted ,to speak to your Mightiness, and after his Eminence the Cardinal, but I will describe that land to you to the best of my ability. It is not the land of my birth, but it is dear to me as my place of residence for many years, and the birth-place of my children. It is evident to me that his Eminence has seen a miraculous vision. The country he saw is certainly a most beautiful one; the multitudes of roads with the carriages travelling rapidly without horses, show how the revenues of the land, millions upon millions, have been spent year after year. The impoverished state of the city which he saw shadows forth its probable condition in future years, when all its riches shall be spent on roads, railroads, and other improvements; and when its annual public income will not be sufficient to pay the interest of its public debt. The unfortunate people whom his Eminence saw hunted through the streets, with tin kettles tied to them, represent, rather fantastically I admit, the landed proprietors of the island, who have been ruined by excessive taxation, and treated in a shameful manner by the misguided people of the cities, who have been led to believe, by their blatant politicians, that those persons were guilty of robbing them with their selfishness and rapacity.'
'Is that all?' asked the King.
'Sire, I could tell your Majesty a great deal more, but time will not permit me.'
'Shall we ever see that enchanted island of which thou hast spoken?'
'I cannot tell, sire; I am not a Jeremiah or a Daniel, and it is not an enchanted island. It is a sober, matter-of-fact island, as large as Ireland, and a thousand times more peaceable. The whole world has made similar advances and improvements.'
'Did we understand thee to say that there are real coaches there which travel on iron roads at great speed without horses?'
'Yes, my liege; I certainly did say so, and it is true.'
'What animals draw them then—asses?'
'Neither horses nor asses, nor animals of any kind.'
'What makes them go then? Have they sails, like ships?'
'No, sire; they are drawn by engines, which carry water and fire, and when the water boils, the vapour or steam rushes through pipes, and makes the wheels go round.'
'Doctor Julius, come forward! Is this man mad?' roared the King in a terrible voice.
'I think not, sire,' answered the Doctor, 'but he may not be quite well; he received very dreadful injuries in the recent battle, and I am not prepared to answer for his hallucinations.'
'We do not believe a word he says,' said the King vehemently.
'Notwithstanding that, your Majesty,' said I calmly, ' I have told you the truth.'
'Be silent, thou caitiff! or, if thou wilt speak, tell us who governs England in these days. Who sits on our throne?'
'Queen Victoria—a good Queen, who never sheds the blood of her subjects.'
'Ha! dost thou say so? Then if she does not shed their blood or mar their white skins, it must be her duty and pleasure to hang or drown a good many of them, judging by your prepossessing countenance.'
'No, sire; only those who commit murder are hanged, and they only after a fair trial and plenty of time for deliberation.'
'I presume to hope your Majesty' said the Doctor, with an evident desire that the King and I should part friends; but he was abruptly interrupted by the sanguinary tyrant.
'Doctor Julius, speak not for him; he is doomed to die, and that within this hour. I can forgive a robber, a murderer, an adulterer, a miser, an incendiary, and a wretch that is poor, but a liar I cannot and will not forgive. Varlet, I convict thee of having told me the greatest lies which it is possible for a man to utter, and therefore I sentence thee to death; away with him to the block! away with him! A liar shall not live!'
I looked round in dismay; the halberdiers approached to lay their ruffianly hands upon me; the buffetiers wagged their jaws and gnashed their teeth. My friend the Doctor seemed as if he could not or would not interfere; but to my surprise the Cardinal stepped forward, and thus addressed the King:
'I take it upon myself to speak to your Majesty on behalf of this man, who is a stranger amongst us. He has answered your questions, and I am inclined to believe has spoken according to his convictions. He may be deranged in his mind—who can tell? It falls to the lot of many who are not suspected. He has not rebelled against your government, or conspired against your person. Forgive me, O my King—why therefore should he die? The world has changed since you and I lived in it. Discoveries of a wonderful nature have doubtless been made. We believe in the existence of heaven, but we cannot tell what marvels may be there to astonish and delight us when we get there. When I was in the world I thought only of the world, of my wealth, grandeur, and power, like the blind idiot and drivelling fool that I was. My cursed ambition and avarice deprived me of all sense and prudence, and thought of the terrible future; and had I served my God as well as I served thee, O King, I should not have been allowed to die in wretchedness on my way to the Tower of London. Be advised; let this man go; shed no more blood!'
'And dost thou charge me with thy death?' bellowed the King. 'What dost thou say to the Christian martyrs, Peter and Paul and Stephen, with hundreds more whom God allowed to die as they died?'
At that moment another commotion took place in the hall. A wild, foreign-looking man, with white hair flying behind him, rushed in and threw himself at the King's feet. He was followed by an infuriated woman, who was armed with a stout stick, with which she attacked the man, and rained on him a shower of blows. He did not resist her or attempt to defend himself, but roared, 'Save me! save me!' The woman screamed, 'Take that, you villain, and that, and that, and that!'
'Unbearable outrage!' shouted the monarch. 'Seize that vile woman!'
She was instantly arrested, and disarmed of her stick. The man was commanded to stand up and tell the Court the meaning of the disgraceful disturbance.
He explained, with volleys of 'Your Majesty,' that he was quietly sitting in his house doing nothing at all, only thinking that if ever he went to the top of the earth again he would lead a different life, better becoming a captain and governor as he had been, when this woman, whom he acknowledged to have been his wife above ground, ran into the room suddenly, knocked him off his chair, and then with her stick drove him out of the house and into this hall, flying for protection and justice.
The King turned to the woman, and asked her why she had dared to beat her husband.
'Because I was in the humour,' answered the virago triumphantly. 'I used to flog him when we lived above on the earth, and I'll flog him still now we are in hell. If I did not flog him I should die of spite, malice, and vexation. He is a poor, miserable, pitiful coward, he is.'
'Is she thy wife? Thou hast said so. Art thou a liar too?' said the King.
'She is, your Majesty. I will tell the truth, as I live.'
'Then punish her sharply, and at once. There is a block, and beside it stands a headsman with his axe. Speak thou the word, and her miscreant head shall roll on the floor.'
'No, your Majesty,' replied the stranger, drawing himself up. 'I will not imbrue, even by word of mouth, my hands in a woman's blood. I would not even strike her, although she has struck me more blows than I can number. She has called me a pitiful coward, and I should be a coward if I struck her again—a woman was my mother.'
'Go to—thou art a fool!' said the King; 'and thou wouldst let a fool kick thee and spit in thy face because a fool was thy father. I hope she will murder thee in her next fit of spite. Loose her—let her go; now we shall see how soon she will tear him to pieces.'
But to the astonishment of all in the room, the woman, when she found herself free, fell on her face at her husband's feet, and implored him with tears to forgive her.
Greatly ashamed and bewildered at this scene, the tyrannical monarch turned to the stranger, and asked him who and what he was, and whence he came.
'I have been Governor and Captain-General, by my own appointment, of a large island somewhere on the surface of the earth, but the name of which has been obliterated from my mind. I came here from another island, to which I was sent against my will. I have been a great traveller, and have seen some strange sights. May I have the honour of relating some of my adventures to your Majesty?'
'Do so, but briefly. We will hear thee with patience.'
These adventures may not, critically speaking, be worth repetition, but I shall give them a place here, and a chapter to themselves, trusting to the kind forgiveness of my readers if they do not find them as interesting to them as they were to me when I heard them from the ghostly lips of the hero himself. From the fact of his having forgotten the name of Land of which he had been governor I concluded that there was a hitch in his intellect, and this was confirmed when he came to the close of his narrative. He appeared to be one of those imperfectly educated, or imperfectly trained, men who are so numerous in the world, men who posses great strength in some directions, but in others are like children; and I think we often receive more practical and useful lessons from the conduct and failings of such men than we are ever likely to do from whole libraries of Johnsonian moralities, with Bampton and Hulsean Lectures to boot.