Horrid Mysteries: a Story/Volume 3/Chapter 8
CHAPTER VIII.
I forbear troubling my readers with an enumeration of the changes that little adventure, which, at bottom, was a mere nothing, produced in my character. They will be perceived, without my assistance, in the sequel of my history. The chief effect it produced was a growing coldness to Caroline. A fluctuation with regard to this point too, in which I had, till then, displayed a firmness that reflected honour on my character; a sudden breaking from a kind of mental sleep, a strong internal ebullition, fleeting sensations, hazarded presensions, a high degree of activity, and a subsequent state of apathy, made me dream, then urged me again to hunt eagerly after peace and happiness, and, when I imagined to have found them, to throw them away suddenly. The enthusiasm arising from a quicker circulation of the blood was past; and I now commence that period in which an unsatisfied internal sense, an ardent desire for activity, begins to stir, and at length relapses again into its former dormant state.
The gay periods of my life are now on the verge, and my career grows more serious. The wanton sports of an exuberant imagination are on the decline; and the reader soon will behold the birth of a new love, great and sacred, glowing and powerful, without any nourishment for the senses, new-moulding my whole character, dispelling its shades, raising the lustre of its brighter parts, artless and omnipotent. The vicious spirit of an abominable confederation purifies itself in its genial fire; and moments are dawning in which the veil of mortality drops before me, and my spirit soars beyond the confines of humanity.
I cannot conceive how it came that, after this incident, I found my disposition not quite so cloudless as before, every gratification being blended with a greater degree of care, and joy and gaiety less benevolently smiling upon me. I relapsed into serious contemplations; and although I was neither dissatisfied nor melancholy, yet I could, notwithstanding the circumspection with which I continually watched over myself, never recover that cheerful station from which that ludicrous adventure had expelled me. I was constantly obliged to spur myself to activity; and I am almost inclined to believe that my taste, and my notions of tranquillity and happiness, were entirely changed.
I was, as it were, gradually prepared for the impending period of my adventures: a serious, but inviting, shade spread itself over every object that came in my way; and I felt as if I returned from the serene luxury of an exuberant and gay landscape, to the melancholy, sweet night of a fragrant grove carpeted over with aromatic flowers, and animated with the plaintive notes of the solitary nightingale. Former scenes of joy, and the heart-expanding retrospect of the past events of my life, now represented themselves to my mind, and absorpt me in sweet reveries. I enjoyed neither the essence nor the external of those events, but only the sentiments and notions which they produced and nurtured in my soul.
The Count either was infected by me; or a different cause had, perhaps, produced the same effect. He spoke less, and was more frequently absorpt in serious reflections. Formerly he had now and then, and always with success, trusted to hazard; but now he consulted carefully with himself before he attempted any thing, and the consequence constantly turned out unfavourable. It was very natural that he was not disposed to ascribe the cause of this phenomenon to himself, for he found it without difficulty in the capricious humour of fickle Fortune. He was sullen and gloomy whenever he could find an excuse for being so; and my altered looks always afforded him a palpable plea for relapsing in that cheerless humour.
Do the events of human life really follow a pre-delineated trait, or does chance sometimes produce oddly united circumstances? Our minds were, indeed, now and then, cheered by lucid and pleasing intervals. Our good humour frequently made ample amends, in an hour, for what we had neglected in the course of several days, when we were refreshed by a sound sleep, if the morning was clear, not too cold, and neither wind nor snow troubled us on the road, which was less frequently the case the nearer we approached the south of France. The most important morning of my life was also the finest I recollect ever to have seen; my mind too partook of the serenity of the sky.
January was already on the verge; and the winter having been as mild as spring, summer seemed to be drawing near. The almond trees were already high in blossom, and the shrubs began to be invested with a leafy verdure. The olive woods, with their unfading green, embosomed already every where germinating wheat-fields; and the lark, the harmonious herald of the morn, strained its warbling throat to welcome the approach of the fine season. The returning spring carries along with it a genial warmth, which diffuses itself through body and mind; every gentle gale breathes an animating spirit; the mystic humming in the air, and the almost visible growth of the budding plants, produces a symbol of a cheerful resurrection. And when we behold again, for the first time, a flower, and the sunbeams gleam through the young leaves, our heart is thrilled with a heavenly rapture, and our language is too poor to do justice to our feelings.
A secret pulsation in my blood, a mystic unaccountable pressure against my panting heart, a sudden stop of the gentle stream of my thoughts, frequently disturbed the peace of my mind on that heavenly morning. Every thing around me seemed to be animated with nameless beings; the mystic sounds which pervaded the forest, the fluctuating of the sun-beams in the rising vapours, the sparkling dew-drops gliding from one leaf upon the other, the current streams of vernal warmth, formed in my busy imagination a smiling picture, without colour, without a distinct contour and centre. The whole was attended with a certain obscure presension, with an ominous, though unintelligible, meaning; and some mystic certainty lurked in my soul, without my daring to confide in it the reality of its existence. The beautifullest landscape hailed our enraptured looks: yet its beauty rather consisted in a secret charm which my soul, unknowingly and secretly, imparted to it, than in the sweet variegated mixture of its parts. On our right a beautiful country seat stretched extensive gardens and pleasure grounds over the contiguous chain of hills: smiling, picturesque groups of trees, and little neat cottages, descended from the declivity into the vale. A rosy-coloured morning vapour was still sweetly blended with the bluish colorit of the back ground, and, where it was less intense, exhibited to our view some part of a village, the lower part of a rock, or trees whose tops towered above the vaporous ocean. The castle, whose scite we also could descry only partially, was not far distant; and the morning sun reflected with radiant splendor from its flaming windows. It was, with its light-green trees, fairy-like suspended in the misty back-ground.
We arrived at length at the park; and one of our servants (I do not recollect whether it was Alfonso, or that of the Count) began to repeat to us the information he had gathered from the landlord in whose house we had slept the preceding night, with regard to the Lord of the Manor. He was a misanthrope, secluded from the world by misfortunes, who educated here a daughter famous for her uncommon beauty. Adelheid, Baronness of V******l, was the brightest ornament and the admiration of the whole province. She lived, however, a solitary life, having no intercourse with her neighbours; few had seen, and a still smaller number ever spoken to her.
This information agitated me in a singular manner. "V******l!" I exclaimed: "have you heard right?"
"I cannot be mistaken, My Lord," he replied.
"The name is very familiar to me: should he, perhaps, be the father of V******l?"
"Whose life you saved at G******," Antonio interrupted me.
"The very person," I resumed. "I now recollect that he frequently has conversed with me of his father and sister; and I am certain he was a native of this province."
In that moment I rejoiced at my good deed. When I resided at G******, that young man fell into the river. He could not swim, and was in danger of being drowned. I instantly plunged into the water, and was so fortunate to save his life. This was, indeed, no heroic action, as I was a good swimmer; and it had entirely slipt my memory; but now I recollected it with pleasure.
I took; from that moment, a warmer interest in every object I beheld. The wall was low, and I could survey all the walks. "Perhaps (thought I) thou wilt meet young V******l in the bosom of his family, happy and animated with friendship for thee."
I was profoundly absorpt in the pleasing sensations this idea created in my heart, when Count S******i suddenly exclaimed, "Stop! Marquis: for Heaven's sake stop! You will instantly drop from your horse. Don't you perceive that your horse's girth has got loose?"
I stopped to alight, the servants not being within call. However, he dismounted, exclaiming, with his amiable kindness, "Keep your seat: my saddle, too, wants to be tied faster." While he was employed to bind the girth faster, I made some motions to make it easier to him, and in the same moment my looks catched a white object in the park. My heart began violently to palpitate; a cold tremour pervaded my limbs; and I scarcely was capable to keep myself in the saddle.
A female being, of an heavenly form, walked in the park, within a small distance from the wall. She carried a book in one hand, and with the other screened her face against the dazzling rays of the sun, reflecting, as it seemed, upon what she had read. A little green straw-hat, fixed with a white ribbon beneath her chin, overshaded her long auburn tresses, which depended in beautiful ringlets upon her girdle: the morning breezes sported with her white gown, which was tied round the waist with a green sash: her uplifted hand was whiter than the muslin from which it stole forth, and the roseate smile of health was diffused over her countenance. Her gown being unfortunately caught by a brier, she was obliged to remove her hand from her eyes to disentangle it; and having extricated her garment, her black eyes met me by accident. She started a little when she saw us so contiguous to her; a deeper hue blushed over her delicate face, and she cast her eyes suddenly to the ground, as if in search for something. My horse, whom I inadvertently had pricked with my spurs, began suddenly to bound; the Count called to me to be on my guard. She looked once more at me, growing as pale as ashes, and quickened her paces. I pacified my horse; and while she turned round a corner into another walk, she directed her beautiful eyes again at me; and in that moment the Count too observed her, exclaiming, "Eternal God!" It is impossible to say more to the praise of a beautiful object than these two words, the astonishment and the features of my friend expressed; and yet it was by far too little. My heart was thrilled with unutterable sensations, and an unknown something pervaded my whole frame.
I could not conceal the state of my heart, which expressed itself legibly on my countenance. The Count observed me awhile seized with speechless astonishment, and at last broke out in the words, "Poor G******!" He perceived the growing passion; and knowing that my temper was too irritable than that I ever could be fortunate in love, wished to be able to destroy my passion in the bud. "But how shall I accomplish this?" he said to himself. "It is impossible her soul should entirely answer her external appearance. There is no possibility to prevent my poor friend from getting acquainted with her; I will, therefore, assist him; and if he sees himself disappointed in his sanguine expectations, the cure of his passion will soon be effected."
He told me, therefore, laughing, "I perceive, Marquis, I shall have an opportunity to act here the same part you undertook from friendship for me in our winter quarters." But apprehending his untimely joke would offend me, he added, in a soothing accent, "yet I hope, Carlos, you will repose confidence in me!" He accompanied these words with a hearty squeeze of his hand, which I returned cordially. Mean while we were arrived at the village, and dismounted at the inn. While I retired to a private apartment, to give audience to my thoughts, the Count mixed with the people of the house, and having made several inquiries concerning the Lord of the Manor, wrote the following note in my name, and sent it to the castle.
"The Marquis of G****** has had the honour to be intimately acquainted with a Mr. de V******l. Having great reason to believe that Baron de V******l is the happy parent of that excellent young man, he begs leave to pay his respects to the father of his friend."
His ambassador returned in the course of a few minutes with one of the Baron's servants, and a formal invitation for myself and the Count. Our horses were instantly taken out of the stable, and our servants desired to bring them with our portmanteaus to the castle. "You must be very intimate with the Baron, or strongly recommended to him," the landlord said to the Count, shaking his head.
The latter now came to my apartment, and finding me on the bed, absorpt in a profound reverie, said, "Will you not get up, Marquis? The Baron," he added coolly, "has just sent us an invitation to come to the castle."
"How! the Baron, did you say?" I exclaimed.
"Yes, yes, the Baron," he replied, smiling, and related his artifice tome. I pressed him to my bosom, transported with rapturous joy, and we went to the castle, but Heaven knows with what an anxiety on my part. My knees trembled, and my heart palpitated violently. I was obliged to take hold of my friend's arm, lest our conductor should perceive my emotion by my gait. Whenever I looked at the windows of the castle, and saw the curtains move, I was violently agitated, my tongue trembled, and I could scarcely speak intelligibly. The attention of some servants, who stood at the gate, opening the folding doors on our approach, made the blood rush into my face; and I now began first to make the observation that our dress was very indifferent; for, to confess the truth, I had nothing on but a simple green hunting coat, and my hair was in the greatest disorder. I could not help communicating these remarks, in a whisper, to the Count. However, he smiled, replying, in German, "What a vanity! I assure you, you never have looked better!" We entered the castle, at length. A man, who appeared to be the butler, welcomed us with respectful politeness, informing us that he had orders to shew us to the drawing room, till his master was dressed. We were conducted to a spacious apartment, decorated with a number of portraits and other pictures. The servant having withdrawn, we began to examine the pictures. They were, probably, family pieces. I did, indeed, gaze at every one of them, but without the least attention, my mind being differently occupied. I admired, at length, even the frames of some, declaring the carving to be excellent, when the Count quickly replied, "Dear Marquis, if you are such an admirer of frames, then come, and look at this: I am sure you never saw a finer one." I went to the other side of the apartment where he was, and he exclaimed, again and again, "Is it possible any thing could be more elegant than this frame?" "You are mistaken, dear Count; for the garland of yon picture is much more beautiful and elegant." "I am of a contrary opinion," he replied, laughing: "this is of a much better workmanship. Upon my honour the picture does not deserve such a beautiful frame." These words naturally made me look at the painting. I started back, seized with astonishment, when I beheld myself as if in a mirror. I instantly recollected to have been persuaded by young V******l, after his accident, to let him have that picture. Astonishment fettered my tongue; and I scarcely heard the Count say, "Faith, Marquis, you are grown much handsomer, or the painter has not done justice to your face."
No sooner had the Count pronounced these words, than a side door opened, and an old man, of a striking beauty, and an elegant carriage, entered the apartment. I bowed respectfully, and was going to thank him for his kind invitation, when he ran towards me, pressing me tenderly to his bosom.
"I know you, Don Carlos," he added; "and the discovery you have made just now saves me a farther elucidation. You have preserved my son's life; receive the grateful effusions of a father's heart; but, at the same time, lament with me his untimely death." With these words a torrent of tears gushed down his cheeks.
"Gracious Heaven!" I exclaimed, kissing the tears from his cheeks, "is it possible?" A violent emotion, which had been preparing all the morning, and only had waited for a pretext of growing loud, interrupted me here. A copious stream of tears relieved my heart; I pressed him to my bosom, and reclined my face on his shoulder.
"Yes, you are quite that sensible, excellent man," he resumed, "whose picture my son has so frequently drawn to us with enthusiastic warmth. Alas! his fate envied him the happiness of seeing you once more. He went into the army some years since; a few months ago he was thrown off his horse, and died of the fall." Here he paused a few moments, and then continued, "Yet you have lost nothing by his death; the son's friendship for you has devolved to the father. I do not love mankind; yet I wish you would accept of his place in my heart, and bestow, at least, a part of your affection for my unhappy boy upon his father." It was very natural that I replied I had loved him long since, and that I would endeavour to deserve his kind opinion. He now left me reluctantly, turning to the Count. I told him his name; and it fortunately happened that he was an intimate friend of the Baron in his younger years. Our reverend host was rejoiced to renew an old acquaintance, and we began soon to converse so cordially as if we had known one another for years, and were members of the same family.
Having spent about half an hour in the most agreeable manner, the Baron said to me, "I now will conduct you to my daughter, who has seen you already this morning, and instantly recollected your features. You see," he added, smiling, "how strongly your image is imprinted on our hearts."
"Our affairs are in an excellent train!" the Count whispered to me, while our kind host opened the door.
"Here, Adelheid, I bring you the friend of our Adolf!" the Baron said, on our entering his daughter's apartment. "He has promised me to be my son and your brother."
The sweet girl sat upon the sofa, holding a book in her hand. She laid it down on our entrance, and rose to meet us. She had exchanged her green hat with a ribbon of the same colour, and her bosom was adorned with a white rose. The rest of her dress was nearly the same as in the morning; her hair was in the same charming disorder, and a miniature picture depended from her swelling bosom. It was a manly face; but fortunately I thought that it was the picture of her brother.
An amiable confusion blushed on her beautiful countenance. My secret agitation did, indeed, render me very unfit for close observation: yet I perceived in her timid looks, and on the faint blushes of her dimpled cheeks, certain symptoms which gave nourishment to my hopes.
An innocent girl is chiefly swayed by inftinct, when she meets the man whom her artless heart has chosen without being conscious of it. The most consummate art could not have invented a more charming reception than simple nature effected here. The visible tremour which glided through her frame was a silent confession that something more than the request of her father prompted her to do what she did afterwards. Her heart spoke through her looks, though it was afraid of being understood. The image, and, if I do not flatter myself too much, the beautified image, of her secret dreams was led into her arms by her own father, to cherish it as a brother. But who can force the human heart not to overstep the limits prescribed by parental authority?
The father did not understand his daughter completely. He imagined that she did not answer his wishes, and his tenderness for me, as much as he had expected. "How!" said he, "does Adelheid thus coldly receive the friends of her father, and her second brother?" Her looks could, however, have made him sensible of his mistake; they intreated for indulgence, and at the same time made the sweetest confession. He smiled benevolently at her confusion; and encircling his daughter with his arm, pressed her to my bosom, requesting me to embrace my sister. Her cheeks burned, and my lips quivered. This was all that I was able to observe.
I now led her to her sofa, presenting the Count to her; and she returned his courtly civility in a manner which betrayed the most accomplished education. I now was more at leisure to make observations, and my eager soul was absorpt in the contemplation of her exquisite charms. I had travelled much, and seen a great many beautiful women; I even had possessed a wife adorned with heavenly charms; and my imagination added to her image, which was deeply engraven in my soul, perfections which the original, perhaps, never had; but here my boldest dreams were more than realized; I frequently doubted that I was awake.
Her soul, which soon recovered its wonted flight, to unfold all its perfections, enchanted me irresistibly by its romantic turn. I never should have thought it possible that such pure and just notions of human life could be treasured up in that beautiful mind, which evidently had received rather a singular turn. Even the prejudices of education, the national notions of her country, and the frailties of the human heart, had, either by accident, or by an innate talent, given birth to adorable virtues. What an angelic heart was here to gain!
A walk in the garden being proposed, she took hold of my arm with the innocent familiarity of a sister; stopped at her favourite spots, and informed me, with an inchanting simplicity, where she sometimes had thought of me. "Don't be angry, dear Marquis," she added, "if I now and then, perhaps, have intruded upon your dreams by an obscure omen; for I really believe that this is possible; and Adolf repeated your name constantly towards the end of his life."
How swiftly did the hours elapse in the company of that angel! The Count, who was elated with joy at my happiness, completely accommodated himself to the nature of her ideas, and in a short time spoke in the same enthusiastic strain that was so peculiar to her. Adelheid found him very amiable, and told it him without reserve. I was several times in danger of giving way to jealousy; yet she always reconciled me again by the tenderness she evinced for me, and by numberless little endearments. The father took an artless and cordial share in the innocent flow of our spirits. The first rapture of joy was, however, of no long duration.