Islam, Turkey, and Armenia, and How They Happened/Chapter XX
CHAPTER XX.
TURKISH HAREM.
1. Turkish Harem, which means "the sacred place," is the name given to the ladies' department in the Mohametan home, where no man is allowed to enter without special permission from inside unless he is the husband, father, brother, son, grandfather, grandson, uncle—in short, one of the nearest relatives who could not legally marry the women in the harem. In case of a stranger's inevitable visit each woman over twelve to thirteen years of age must cover her face. The visitor's duty is to stop at the outside of the gate and knock, saying, "Take your veils," and wait for the response from inside. The houses in Turkey are surrounded by a strong thick wall, at least ten to twelve foot high, having only one gateway for entrance, which is kept closed and bolted. Sometimes the husband locks it in the morning and takes the key with him to his business place. Wealthy people have their special department for men entered by a separate gate, and receive their visitors and guests in this department, which is called "Selam lik." A doctor's visit to a harem, which is very seldom among Moslems, is regarded as an exception for the harem law, according to the decree of the Koran that "Necessities modify the prohibition." The ladies of the Imperial Palace were lately vaccinated by doctors, stretching out their arms through a hole in the partition between the two departments. The internal management of the harem is sometimes left to colored eunuchs, but commonly the mother-in-law, or in her absence, the chief hahum (lady of the harem) has its charge. Cooking is done in the harem, and the dishes are sent to the men's department through a revolving closet in the partition wall and served by male waiters. The inside of the harem yard must not be seen from any house near or far; hence the law for buildings, especially for windows, is very strict, and the exterior of the houses have the appearance of an ancient castle wall. As the minarets upon which the muezzin crier calls the believers to worship are always higher than the neighboring houses, the women must conceal themselves in the house until the crier makes his brief tour around the minaret. Very often blind men or children are employed in this service, and men of ugly voice are preferred by many pious Moslems that their wives may not be attracted and tempted to come out of their inner apartments. Some exceedingly fanatic Turks do not allow even the Christian women to enter their harems. Blind men, idiots, eunuchs, and sometimes the old domestic stewards, are allowed in harems.
2. Polygamy Among the Turks. Any Moslem who can afford may have four wives in legal marriage, and may have as many concubines as he can purchase or capture. The present Sultan—not the most intemperate of the Ottoman rulers—is said to have 1,500 women in his harem. By the Mohametan sacred law all the women in the empire belong to the prophet and his successor on the throne. As the majority are not able to support many wives they must be content with a few on this side of the grave, cherishing the hope that they will have many in the future paradise. Some rich men, however, prefer to have only one or two wives, because of the habitual discord, extravagance and crimes in the larger harems, where jealousy, slander and constant quarreling are the daily practice of the "muminehs," the faithful women.
Marriage is regarded a religious necessity, hence every man, even the poorest, the maimed and the crazy, are encouraged to marry, very often the expenses for wedding being paid by a wealthy aga or well-to-do neighbors. Their motto is, "A dog can drag a hide anyhow;" that is, a man can support a wife anyhow. They also say, "When a person is created his supplies also are created with him," and they feel very content with what they may have by working the least. They marry nearer relatives than the Christians do. A man must marry his deceased brother's wife or wives for the sake of preserving the family inheritance.
3. The Situation of Turkish Women. A man may divorce his wife by simply desiring to do so; no reasonable cause is demanded of him. A woman can never demand a divorce, no matter how cruel and unfaithful her husband may be; she may be permitted to live separate if she can afford it. Hence, the only possible way to get rid of a bad husband is to irritate him until he asks for a divorce. There is one point favorable to women—that a husband can not get a divorce unless he first pays the dowry he promised to his wife, according to their wealth and rank, differing from ten to one thousand dollars, or more. The "sheri," the legal branch of the government which attends to marriages and divorces, takes great care on this point to secure and protect the wife's right. A Mohametan may, and often does, marry and divorce the same wife three times by usual transactions of the "sheri" and by the consent of the woman, but not the fourth time unless the woman is married by another man and also divorced by his free will. If a thrice divorced wife is not already married by another man, and if both parties desire a re-union in marriage, the demand of the law is to find another man to marry this woman and divorce her legally, which the poor or the crazy people will do for the sake of money. In some instances, however, the man who was thought crazy proves himself to be so sane as to keep the wife for himself or demands a very large sum for the desired divorce, for which the law does not force him. If a wife be guilty of impurity in matrimony her husband has the right to have her imprisoned by the government for life, or, as the Koran says, "until she finds some divine help to make her escape." The children born of a divorced wife can never be deprived of the right to inherit their father's property, even if they are allowed to live with their mother, in which case the man is forced to pay his children's living until the boy is seven years old and the girl nine.
4. The Rights of Turkish Women. Mohamet, being very fond of his mother (who was widowed soon after, or, according to others, just before the birth of the only child) has repeatedly ordered honor and mercy towards mothers, especially widowed mothers. "No man," the Mohametan law says, "can repay the merit of his mother, even if he could carry her on his back all the way to Kabeh," the holy temple in Mecca.
But the same law evidently ranks woman lower than man by limiting, for example, her legal rights. An heiress can only get the half proportion of inheritance that an heir of the same relation may get. The wife can only get one-fifth of the property of her deceased husband if he has bodily heirs from her or from a former wife. A woman can never claim a divorce nor make an objection if her husband marries three wives more and desires to keep concubines. During the husband's lifetime the wife has no claim on his movable or immovable properties, only her dowry and personal ornaments and clothing presented to her. The consequences of the limitation of family rights are mutual hatred, unfaithfulness, crime, and a general degradation of woman. Women are not allowed to attend mosques for the daily prayers; they may have them in the harem. In the month of Ramazan, the fasting month, they are permitted to go to the mosque, but must enter from a special small back door and sit in a gallery enclosed by a thick lattice work. They can never attend social entertainments unless given by nearest relatives. They are never allowed to sit at the same table, even with their fathers, brothers and husbands, if there be a guest in the house. When they go out of their gates they must put on a long gown and a thick veil. If they go with their father, brother or husband, which is very seldom, they must walk behind. The best part of the road must always be given to the man. In the interior of the country if women see a rich man or an official coming they must sit on the floor and turn their face to the wall until "His honor" is past.
In villages, these harem ceremonies are not practicable, but the condition of women is far worse. Their husbands have already purchased them by paying $10 to $20 in cash, or an ox or a few sheep, or some pieces of carpets or rugs, or so many bushels of wheat or barley. Besides the common work of the house they have their share in all farming work, in sowing, reaping or pulling the crop with their hands, carrying it on their backs and threshing it under the burning sun, which takes weeks, for the lack of machinery. In such places it is a universal habit for the man to ride on his horse or donkey, and the poor woman, often barefooted, walks after him. At the same time her baby (and perhaps the cradle) is strapped on her back, or a load of wood or other burden.
The Turkish women, especially in the villages, are very free and quick in their talks, having no hindrance to use their language. So you can hear them speaking very clearly and loud, sometimes laughing, sometimes cursing and very often gossiping. When they meet one or more pretty Armenian young people they seldom fail to say, "May plague strike your body," or if they meet a Christian funeral processing, "May Allah cause you all to perish at once," or call loud to the neighbor's wife, "O, Emineh! look this way, a giaour's corpse is going; may all of them have the same destiny by allah," and the other responds, "Amen!" During any uprising against the Christians Turkish women are very happy and always shout and urge the men to slaughter.
5. The Titles, and Common Sayings about Women. When you meet with a friend you can never ask about the condition of the women in his house unless you have close relationship with the family; then you must say, "How is the household?" or most intimately, "How is my sister?" or my aunt Emineh?" And he replies, "They kiss your hand." If a man speaks about his wife before others, he never says "My wife" or "Mrs. so and so," but "the people of the house," "your maid-servant," "ash carrier," "sweeper of the house," "the mother of the children," "your sister," etc. A woman is called after her father's name, even if she be married.
Some Turkish proverbs may better show their idea about women: "Woman is a deficient creature." "Woman has long hair, but short mind." "Obey a woman's word but one in forty." "Whip must not be far from woman." "Do not walk with woman, else you will suffer calamity." "Woman is the satan of man." "May allah preserve you from the evil of woman." "Do not trust the friendship of woman." "Woman has no religion." "She leaves confusion among seven quarters." "She loads seven houses on a donkey and rides also upon it." "You woman-minded fool !"
They have numerous stories about the evils and tricks of women. They say, "Satan made a bet with a woman upon a pair of slippers to see which of them could cause greater confusion in the world; and they began the work among the families. After some time, satan being convinced of woman's superiority in devices, and fearing that she might one day harm even himself, he gave up, and putting the slippers on the end of a long pole, stretched it to the woman, being afraid to go near her."
6. Turkish Family Discipline. In order to understand the Turkish character, we must go to the foundation, the family discipline. They have no idea and no word for home. The mother has not her proper position in the family. Filial, fraternal and paternal love is not nobler among them than it is among the pigs—if the comparison is not injustice to the latter. The jealousy, slander, quarrelling and crimes among the children of different mothers are terrible beyond imagination. The defect of the Turkish family discipline does not consist simply of some neglects, but also positive inducements to corruption. As soon as the child is able to walk and talk, he is given to the hands of the meanest of servants (a nurse) to take them where they please, to teach them what they know, to make of them what they may. When they come down from the shoulders of these first teachers they are sent either to schools as corrupt as Sodom, or let loose in the streets to loaf and learn the accumulated corruption of the community, and to harm the Christian children they meet in the streets. If they do not see any giaour to insult and beat, they fight with each other and curse against each other's "faith and religion" and the ancestral graves, etc., most horribly. When several Turks, even the most noted ones, come together and have a little child among them their chief amusement will be, without exception, to make that child utter vulgar words in his broken language. The father of the child, most probably the host of the party, would say to him: "Now, my boy, swear to this uncle's beard," at the same time helping him to speak the necessary words; then says, "Swear to the other uncle's turban," "to that yonder uncle's daughter," "to this young uncle's sweetheart," etc., etc. All will laugh in concert at his each attempt, and praise him for his smartness, and seriously beg long life for him from Allah.