Page:010 Once a week Volume X Dec 1863 to Jun 64.pdf/278

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"Maggie," said mine hostess, "can ye make oot what the strange mon says?"

"Au dinna ken," responded Maggie.

Another essay towards an elucidation of my wants, at the same time pointing to the teapot on the dresser, "Awm thinkin he'll just be for wantin' the tae-watter and eggs," quoth the more intelligent damsel. And those viands, together with a goodly rasher, or, as it is called in those parts, collop of bacon, were presently set before me, and I fell to with the hearty appetite of a pedestrian; and having partaken of an abundant repast, I put a coal to the cutty of contentment, and enjoyed the luxury of repose after my somewhat toilsome day.

After a while, the clattering of hoofs on the stone pavement outside announced an arrival, and at a whistle from without mine hostess undid the door, and three men entered, wrapped up in long horsemen's coats. The apathetic hostess offered no kind of greeting, but went at once to the flitch of bacon and cut a quantity of huge collops, which the energetic Maggie soon had hissing and brawling in the frying-pan. Meanwhile one of the men, who turned out to be mine host, brought in a jar, or grey-hen, of whisky, which he set on a circular table; and he and his two companions having taken off their wraprascals, and stamped upon the sanded floor to reanimate their feet after the ride, sat down and took each a caulker, the landlord motioning me to do the same, which to have declined would, I knew, have amounted to Border treason. But it was not until "the sacred rage of hunger" had been fully appeased, that a word was spoken by either party.

The meal consisted of the aforesaid collops, and a quantity of potatoes boiled in their coats, with cheese (the accompaniment to every Cumbrian meal), and bread made from a mixture of pease meal and barley. When this banquet had been bolted, rather than eaten, the men drew round the fire (the table, which the hostess speedily cleared of the fragments of the meal, being placed, with the grey-hen, within convenient reach of all), and the well-blackened pipes were drawn out, filled, and lighted by thrusting them among the burning turf.

It was now that, for the first time, I engaged the notice of these worthies; and the host saluted me in words which, though a Border man myself, I could only with difficulty make sense of, enjoining me not to spare the grey-hen, and inquiring what road I travelled. While replying, another whistle was heard at the door; and Maggie ushered in a man, younger than the others, wearing a grey plaid, and apparently a shepherd. He was accompanied by a colley dog,[1] which, after a few preliminary snarls, made the customary gyration, turning round three times, and then stretched himself down along with three others which already occupied the hearth. The last comer tossed off a caulker, brought himself into "neebor raw" as invited, and betook himself to the pipe, while the landlord addressed him to the following purport:

"AahowsaawyeaabutIsemaingladtoseeyedyewant any gimmers coomben coomben pull in the langsettle­aabuta'smain­gladtoseeye­dyewantany­lambs?"

This intelligible speech was responded to by another equally lucid:

"Noonooadinnawantanylambs but mebbies­awant­til­sellsome­here­gude­wife­help­us­off­wi­ma­spatterdashes­for­theyre­uncomucky."

Which speeches may be rendered into the more plain form of the Border tongue, thus:

"Eh! how's a' wi' ye? Eh! but I'se main glad to see ye. D'ye want any gimmers? Come ben, come ben,[2] pull in the lang settle. Eh! but aw's main glad to see ye. D'ye want any lambs?"

"Na, na, aw dinna want any lambs, but maybe aw want to sell some. Here, gude wife, help us off wi' ma leggins, for they're unco' clarty."[3]

Not greatly interested in this kind of dialogue, being tired and drowsy, I was meditating a further appeal to the hostess's hospitality with reference to some kind of sleeping accommodation—being resolved, in the absence of better means, to stretch myself for the night on the long settle—when a most uncouth and singular figure slouched across the floor, though whence it came I could not devise, for it seemed to have arisen from the sanded flag-stones of the kitchen floor. It was a shambling, slouching creature, with starting, bloodshot eyes, and twisted neck, the chin drooping upon the chest, and hands that worked and clutched like the hands of a drowning man, as he worked his way towards the grey-hen. His advent was hailed with shouts and laughter.

"Odds, here cooms auld Maartie! Hoy, auld ghaist, wake up an' hev a pull o' the grey-hen; say awa',[4] auld Maartie; steady, now, steady, auld cheat-the-woodie! Haribee hills! miles awa! Eh! there it goes doon his gizzern. My certes, whaten a willeywaugh! Now settle thee doon, auld black sheep! an' gie's thy cracks."[5]

To all this the strange being only responded with a sort of chuckling guttural rattle in the
  1. Sheep dog.
  2. Further in.
  3. Soiled with mire.
  4. To take say, or assay, of the liquor. It was the custom in the olden time for the mayor and corporation of Newcastle to go the round of the public-houses, in order to take assay of the ale, and ascertain if Boniface had provided a good and wholesome beverage for his guests.
  5. Chat.