Page:Anthology of Japanese Literature.pdf/257

she thought that she had wept all the tears she possessed, but some indeed remained—she wept now more even than before, until it seemed she would weep her whole body away. Tomoyuki, torn by regret and an unbecoming weakness, wished that things could be again as they were, but suddenly reflecting that he must not let others see him in this womanish state he changed his expression and feigned indifference, as if he were completely undisturbed. Here are some of the many poems he composed during the winter of the previous year, after his arrest:

nagaraete mi wa itazura ni hatsu shimo no oku kata shiranu yo ni mo furu ka na

Though yet I survive I shall meaninglessly die: Like the first frost Which cannot find a resting place, I pass my days in the world.

ima wa haya ika ni narinuru ukimi zo to onaji yo ni dani tou hito mo nashi

Now, already, Even while in the same world, No one asks any more What has happened to me Who have thus been afflicted.

The lay priest Sasaki, the Lord of Sado, escorted him from the capital. At Ausaka Barrier Tomoyuki wrote:

kaeru beki toki shinakereba kore ya kono yuku wo kagiri no  Ausaka no seki

Since there will not be A time when I may return, Mine is a journey But of going, once I pass Ausaka Barrier.

They stopped for a while at a place called Kashiwabara, where the priest was apparently waiting for a reply to the message he had sent to Kamakura about Tomoyuki’s disposition. During this time the priest related to him various tales in which he showed his sympathy. “Everything that happens is the result of actions committed in a former existence. You are not the only one who has been implicated, and I couldn’t very well help you if I didn’t help the others.