Page:Base-ball ballads (IA baseballballads00rice).pdf/38

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THE BUSHERS.

(A big advance order is now in for Christy Matthewson's [sic] forthcoming volume on baseball; John L. Sullivan is at work upon a romance of the ring, of which he is the hero; Battling Nelson has just closed up a comfortable wad upon his edition of "The Life and Battles of Matthew Battling Nelson.")

What league did Shakespeare ever lead?
That busher Byron had the nerve
To peddle out poetic creed,
Who never batted at a curve.
I'll bet this Dante was a bluff,
And minor leaguer on the side;
For while he wrote a bale of stuff,
His name is not in Spaulding's [sic] guide.

What belt did Homer ever win?
Fine chance that dub would have to-day
To cash in on the easy tin
Who never put his man away;
And Milton had the nerve to try
To make a living out of verse,
Who never closed a rival's eye
Or split the big end of a purse.

No wonder in the days of yore
Those ancient artists had no chance
To chew a steak—or that they wore
Big, healthy patches on their pants;
In place of farming out a crop
Of rhyme and meter without flaw,
They should have learned to throw a drop
Or slam a wallop to the jaw.

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