atic individuals are poisoned till finally they’ll have everybody, this madness changes you completely and in the morning you no longer have the same mind—the drug is invented by Airapatianz, it’s the brainwash drug, I always thought that Romana was a Communist being a Rumanian, and as for Billie that gang of hers is strange, and Cody dont care, and Dave’s all evil just like I always figured maybe” but soon my thoughts arent even as “rational” as that any more but become hours of raving—There are forces whispering in my ear in rapid long speeches advising and warning, suddenly other voices are shouting, the trouble is all the voices are longwinded and talking very fast like Cody at his fastest and like the creek so that I have to keep up with the meaning tho I wanta bat it out of my ears—I keep waving at my ears—I'm afraid to close my eyes for all the turmoiled universes I see tilting and expanding suddenly exploding suddenly clawing in to my center, faces, yelling mouths, long haired yellers, sudden evil confidences, sudden rat-tat-tats of cerebral committees arguing about “Jack” and talking about him as if he wasnt there—Aimless moments when I'm waiting for more voices and suddenly the wind explodes huge groans in the million treetop leaves that sound like the moon gone mad—And the moon rising higher, brighter, shining down in my eyes now like a streetlamp—The huddled shadowy sleeping figures over there so coy—So human and safe, I’m crying “I'm not human any more and I'll never be safe any more, Oh what I wouldnt give to be home on Sunday afternoon yawning because I’m bored, Oh for that again, it’ll never come back again—Ma was right, it was all bound to drive me mad, now it’s done—What’ll I say to her?—Shell be terrified and go mad herself—Oh ti Tykey, aide mué—me who’s just eaten fish have no right to ask for brother Tyke again—”—An argot of sudden screamed reports ratles through my head in a language I never heard but understand immediately—For a moment I see blue Heaven and the Virgin’s white veil but suddenly a
