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even in such a case it is usually sought to provide the unfortunate one with a husband, though the ordinary requirements as to rank and position are not of course insisted on in such instances.
Mutual relation of parents-in-law and sons-in-law.The peculiar relation between the son-in-law and the bride's parents in Acheh, a relation which must be regarded as a rudiment of earlier social conditions, commences from the time of the betrothal. Neither the engaged man himself nor his parents may at any time during the continuance of the betrothal cross the threshold of the girl's parents. Nothing short of a death in the family can create an exception to this rule.
All intercourse between the son-in-law and his parents-in-law is, even after marriage, regarded as improper and restricted to the unavoidable. This notion, which still prevails in some parts of Java, but seems to be gradually dying out in that island, subsists in full force in Acheh, Son-in-law and father-in-law shun one another's presence like the plague, and when chance brings them together, pass with averted faces. Should it be impossible to avoid communicating with each other, they do so through the friendly interposition of a third person, whom they each address in turn.
Such a situation might at first sight appear to be untenable, for the Achehnese daughter really never quits her parents' roof. According to their means, the latter either vacate a portion of their house in favour of each daughter that marries, or supply the lack of room by adding on to the main building or putting up new houses in the same enclosure. Yet when the son-in-law visits his wife or "comes home" as it is called[1], he takes no notice of her family even though he remains for months or even years at a time within the same enclosure. To facilitate this discreet behaviour, which is strictly prescribed by the adat, after every absence whether long or short, he notifies his return by coughing loud and long, so as to give the inmates time to get out of the way and leave his part of the house free for himself and his wife and children. In a respectable family this coughing is the only audible interchange of thought between the parents of the woman and her husband.
Well-to-do parents often have a house built for a daughter who is approaching the marriageable age. Others furnish an outfit, which is
- ↑ Wòë; see p. 295 above.
