Page:ChroniclesofEarlyMelbournevol.1.pdf/136

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106
THE CHRONICLES OF EARLY MELBOURNE.

Police Office should be built in a central locality, and where the Police buildings now stand in Swanston Street, was chosen as the most desirable site. Tenders were accepted for the present edifice in June, 1847. T h e first contract was for the blue-stone shell, and M r . James W e b b (a well-known builder) was the tenderer at ,£2000. T h e digging for the foundation began on the 1st August. Further contracts were from time to time entered into, and the building took just two years to complete, for it was opened for the first time for public business on the 2nd August, 1849, w h e n the following Magistrates (City and District) appeared on the Bench, viz., the Mayor (Mr. W . M . Bell), Messrs. James Smith, Andrew Russell, William Hull, R. W . Pohlman, Archibald M'Lachlan^ W . B. Wilmot, William Firebrace, Charles Payne, and Alexander Johnstone. Not one of these gentlemen is n o w alive. T h e present watch-house was not commenced until October, 1849, and, as originally built, containedfivecells for prisoners, and another (styled a room) for the keeper. It was opened for the reception of prisoners on the 22nd December following. T h e double Court business continued to be transacted in the new building for some time, when that of the District was removed to a two-storied house in Little Collins Street East, which, for many years, formed the business premises and private residence of Mr. Andrew Russell, an ex-merchant, and one of the ex-Mayors. O n the establishment of a separate Court for the District, Mr. Robert ("Bob") Cadden was appointed its Clerk, and during the m a n y years hefilledthe post, there could be no better officer.or greater favourite with Magistrates, police and suitors. T h e City Police office and watch-house of to-day are very different from the structure of 1849,for though the kernels of both remain, they have been so altered, added to, and built about, that either externally or internally they are almost unrecognisable. Yet I doubt m u c h whether more substantial justice is meted out now than in the olden time. T h e early unpaid Magistrates were, perhaps without an exception, m e n of good position, and possessing a degree of education and culture in which the three R's. did not rank as an occult science. Though they sometimes packed a Bench, they could not be rounded up like sheep in a paddock when a case affecting some special individual or interest was set d o w n for hearing. There used to be queer and racy scenes occasionally, of which a few specimens are here selected, all of which owe their parentage to the modern age of J.P.-ship. I purposely omit names, times, and places, as I wish not to be personally offensive. O n e day at a Court not twenty miles from Melbourne, a person was charged with the offence of arson, and though there was strong circumstantial evidence for the prosecution, the presiding Solon dismissed the case with these sapient remarks, and a withering scowl of contempt at the Sergeant standing near him : " Arson ! what does it mean ? There is no such law crime as that, why didn't ye pull the fellow up for shindyism, and then I'd send the scoundrel to gaol !" In another place the police hadfiledseveral qui tarn informations, which were entered on the causesheet as Regina v. T o m , Dick, and Harry, &c. W h e n thefirstcase came on, T o m did not answer the roll-call, and "Regina v. T o m " was repeated several times. T h e noise seemed to wake up the Magistrate from a condition of semi-consciousness, and he roared out " Rejinee ! Rejinee! I suppose he's some foreigner chap ; maybe a Chinee ! Constable, go and call him three times more at the door, and if he don't answer this time, I'll issue m y warrant to arrest him !" Again, there was a legal discussion on a certain Bench as to what branch of law a particular transgression came under, when the Mayor of a municipality pompously declared " That c o m m o n law was the law of the people generally, and Equity the axe of Parliament! " O n another occasion a fussy little Justice Shallow, with less brains than impudence, in his eagerness to clear up some abstruse point to the satisfaction of his "learned " compeers, rushed the Clerk as if going to butt him, saying, " C o m e be quick and get m e the Hact of Parliament that has the c o m m o n law in it ! " T h e Clerk would be a deal cleverer than the Magistrate if he could do so. A respected and inoffensive Attorney was once mildly arguing a case before another J.P., when some remark m a d e was snapped up as offensive, and the " worshipful " was down on the practitioner accordingly. H e said something harsh and vulgar, whereat the other expressed a hope that at least he should be treated in a gentlemanly manner. " Y o u a jintleman," yelled the supposed representative of all that was right and proper, " W h y you're only a 'solster,' an' if you don't belay your gab in a jiffy, be Jove I'll have you in chokey before you can say Jack Robinson."