Page:Devonshire Characters and Strange Events.djvu/896

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DEVONSHIRE CHARACTERS

Whether they would or no, the two visitors were obliged to comply; they knew the imperious nature of the Doctor, and that unless he were humoured, he would kick them out of the house and refuse to attend to the patient.

A roast leg of mutton was placed before Dr. Budd; he proceeded to carve a great slice, then took it and threw the slab of meat in the face of the gentleman on his left, who staggered back and hastily seized his napkin to wipe his face and sweep the juice from his shirt-front and waistcoat. But before he had cleansed himself, slap came another slice of mutton in his face, and then a third. At this the man with the lock-jaw burst into a roar of laughter.

"There," said Budd, "I have cured you: you will have to pay for a new waistcoat for your brother, it's messed with grease."

Budd was sent for to visit a poor man who was bad with quinsy, could not swallow, could not even speak. Said the Doctor to the patient's wife, "I be coming to dine with you, I and my assistant John."

"Lor' a mussy, sir, I ain't got nothing fit for gentlevolks to dine on here," said the amazed woman.

"Here's a guinea," said Budd. "Go and get us a bottle of wine and make us apple dumplings, and plenty of these latter. Will be here at one o'clock."

At the appointed hour, Budd and his assistant arrived. The table was spread with a clean cloth, and humble but neat ware was placed on it all in the room where the patient was lying gasping for breath. Budd and John seated themselves one at each end of the table; and the dumplings were produced, round, hard, hot, and steaming. Budd took one up in his hands, turned it about, and, all at once, threw it at the head of his assistant, and caught him full crash between the