system in the incredibly short space of three months. This man was a hard drinker. He (Professor Muff) had dispersed three drops of rum through a bucket of water, and requested the man to drink the whole. What was the result? Before he had drunk a quarter, he was in a state of beastly intoxication; and five other men were made dead-drunk with the remainder.
"The president wished to know whether an infinitesimal dose of soda-water would have recovered them? Professor Muff replied that the twenty-fifth part of a teaspoonful, properly administered to each patient, would have sobered him immediately. The president remarked that this was a most important discovery, and he hoped the lord mayor and court of aldermen would patronize it immediately.
"A member begged to be informed whether it would be possible to administer—say, the twentieth part of a grain of bread and cheese to all grown-up paupers, and the fortieth part to children, with the same satisfying effect as their present allowance.
"Professor Muff was willing to stake his professional reputation on the perfect adequacy of such a quantity of food to the support of human life—in workhouses; the additional of the fifteenth part of a grain of pudding twice a week would render it a high diet.
"Professor Nogo called the attention of the section to a very extraordinary case of animal magnetism. A private watchman, being merely looked at by the operator from the opposite side of a wide street, was at once observed to be in a very drowsy and languid state. He was followed to his box, and being once slightly rubbed on the palms of the hands, fell into a sound sleep, in which he continued without intermission for ten hours.
"SECTION C—STATISTICS.
"HAY-LOFT, ORIGINAL PIG.
"PRESIDENT—MR. WOODENSCONSE. VICE-PRESIDENTS—MR.
LEDBRAIN AND MR. TIMBERED.
"Mr. Slug stated to the section the result of some calculations he had made with great difficulty and labor, regarding the state of infant education among the middle classes of London. He found that, within a circle of three miles from the Elephant and Castle, the following were
