Page:Dickens - A Child s History of England, 1900.djvu/559

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THE MUDFOG ASSOCIATION.
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would be allowed to stand in the way of such a great public improvement.

"Mr. Crinkles hoped so too; but he feared that if the gentlemen of the swell mob persevered in their objection, nothing could be done.

"Professor Grime suggested that surely in that case her majesty's government might be prevailed upon to take it up.

"Mr. Crinkles said that if the objection were found to be insuperable, he should apply to parliament, who, he thought, could not fail to recognize the utility of the invention.

"The president observed that up to his time parliament had certainly got on very well without it; but as they did their business on a very large scale, he had no doubt they would gladly adopt the improvement. His only fear was that the machine might be worn out by constant working.

"Mr. Coppernose called the attention of the section to a proposition of great magnitude and interest, illustrated by a vast number of models, and stated with much clearness and perspicuity, in a treatise entitled 'Practical suggestions on the necessity of providing some harmless and wholesome relaxation for the young noblemen of England.' His proposition was that a space of ground of not less than ten miles in length and four in breadth should be purchased by a new company, to be incorporated by act of parliament, and inclosed by a brick wall of not less than twelve feet in height. He proposed that it should be laid out with highway roads, turnpikes, bridges, miniature villages, and every object that could conduce to the comfort and glory of four-in-hand clubs, so that they might be fairly presumed to require no drive beyond it. This delightful retreat would be fitted up with most commodious and extensive stables, fur the convenience of such of the nobility and gentry as had a taste for hostlering, and with houses of entertainment furnished in the most expensive and handsome style. It would be further provided with whole streets of door-knockers and bell-handles, of extra size, so constructed that they could be easily wrenched off at night, and regularly screed on again by attendants provided for the purpose, every day. There would also be gas-lamps of real glass, which could