CHAPTER XXV
THE SEXTON SPEAKS
FUNERALS may be divided into three classes, for there be solemn funerals, there be grizzly funerals, and there be funny 'uns. The funniest funeral I ever did see was in China. Do you know, Captain, they very seldom buries out there? They leaves the blasted coffins above ground. The whole of the countryside is a-littered with 'em. For untidy burials China waves the flag, and they has other very funny customs about funerals out there, too. When a fellow goes and dies out there it's a devil of a business he has to go through before he gets fixed up final. Every family out there 'as their own very particular priest, you understand, and this very particular priest is always a very sly sort o' dog. The dead 'un is put into the coffin, and then the family pays their sly dog a considerable sum o' money in exchange for very hard prayers wot the sly dog makes for 'em to his gods. He goes away and prays for weeks on end, askin' his gods just where exactly the family ought to bury their dead 'un to enable him to get into heaven by the most convenient route. And as the sly dog gets paid all the
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