Vi'lits
I looks fer 'arf a second at the fambily disgrace,
Then I picks another vi'lit so 'e couldn't see me face.
I wus grinnin' most unfatherlike, an' feelin' good inside.
"You show yer Mar that eye uv yours. I'm 'shamed uv you!" I lied.
I watch 'im creep inside the 'ouse, an' 'ear 'is mother's yell.
An' then I straightens up me face 'an goes inside as well.
'Twus raw beef-steak an' vinegar, an' tears, before she's done.
An' the sort uv look she gimme sez, "Yeh see 'ow 'e's begun!"
I don't disturb the rites excep' to give some kind advice.
In younger days I've caught black-eyes, an' give 'em once or twice.
"That big boy should be punished," sez Doreen, "'oo 'it our Bill."
I pats the 'ero's bandages, an' answers 'er, "'E will."
That ev'nin', down be'ind the shed, near where the scrub grows dense,
I gives young Bill a lesson in the art uv self-defence.
I teaches 'im an uppercut that Ginger Mick tort me
In old days, down in Spadger's Lane. I gits down on me knee
