Page:Edgar Huntly, or The Sleep Walker.djvu/60

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44
EDGAR HUNTLY.

tionate solicitude into the cause: it could not be explained. I could safely make light of it, and represent it as something which would probably disappear of itself, as it originated without any adequate cause. She was obliged to acquiesce in my imperfect account.

"Day after day passed in this state of fluctuation. I was conscious of the dangers of delay, and that procrastination, without rendering the task less necessary, augmented its difficulties. At length, summoning my resolution, I demanded an audience. She received me with her usual affability. Common topics were started; but she saw the confusion and trepidation of my thoughts, and quickly relinquished them. She then noticed to me what she had observed, and mentioned the anxiety which these appearances had given her. She reminded me of the maternal regard which she had always manifested towards me, and appealed to my own heart whether any thing could be said in vindication of that reserve with which I had lately treated her, and urged me, as I valued her good opinion, to explain the cause of a dejection that was too visible.

"To all this I could make but one answer:——'Think me not, madam, perverse or ungrateful. I came just now to apprise you of a resolution that I had formed: I cannot explain the motives that induce me. In this case, to lie to you would be unpardonable; and since I cannot assign my true motives, I will not mislead you by false representations. I came to inform you of my intention to leave your service, and to retire with the fruits of your bounty, to my native village, where I shall spend my life, I hope, in peace.'

"Her surprise at this declaration was beyond measure. She could not believe her ears; she had not heard me rightly; she compelled me to repeat it; still I was jesting; I could not possibly mean what my words imported.

"I assured her, in terms still more explicit, that my resolution was taken, and was unalterable; and again entreated her to spare me the task of assigning my motives.

"This was a strange determination. What could be the grounds of this new scheme? What could be the necessity of hiding them from her? This mystery was not to be endured; she could by no means away with it: she