Page:Elizabethan & Jacobean Pamphlets.djvu/235

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Thomas Dekker

reuenues of extraordinary wit, will spend your shallow censure vpon the most elaborate Poeme so lauishly, that all the painted table-men about you, take you to be heires apparent to rich Midasse, that had more skill in alchimy then Kelly with the Phylosophers stone; (for all that he could lay his fingers on, turned into beaten gold) dry Tobacco with my leaues (you good dry brained polipragmonists) till your pipe offices smoake with your pittifully stinking girds shot out against me. I coniure you (as you come of the right goose-caps) staine not your house; but when at a new play you take vp the twelue-penny roome next the stage; (because the Lords and you may seeme to be haile fellow wel-met) there draw forth this booke, read alowd, laugh alowd, and play the Antickes, that all the garlike mouthd stinkards may cry out, Away with the fool. As for thee, Zoylus, goe hang thy selfe: and for thee Momus, chew nothing but hemlock, and spit nothing but the sirrup of Aloes vpon my papers, till thy very rotten lungs come forth for anger. I am Snake-proofe: and, though, with Hanniball, you bring whole hogs-heads of vinegar-railings, it is impossible for you to quench or come ouer my Alpine-resolution: I will faile boldly and desperately alongst the shore of ye Ile of Guls; and in defiance of those terrible blockhouses, their loggerheads, make a true discouery of their wild (yet habitable) Country.