Page:Fielding - Sex and the Love Life.pdf/44

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SEX AND THE LOVE-LIFE

turning ego-centric, sexual interests into channels of useful social activity.

The basic thought behind the best present-day methods of training youth is to keep them occupied with constructive activities, to permit large freedom of bodily movement and physical development, and to turn their amazing curiosity and inquisitiveness into impersonal channels—that is, fostering an interest in and the desire to learn the secrets of the natural world about us.

Normally, narcissism represents a transitory period, and serves a useful purpose in developing an ego-ideal, which in its best sense and in its normal proportions is summed up in the phrase self-esteem, or self-respect. It provides the impetus in the ambition to grow up into a worth-while human being.

On the other hand, if the individual remains at the narcissistic level too long, or does not break away from this elementary ideal as completely as he should, he remains over self-centered, vain, egoistic, or even asocial and primitive in his points of view. He does not become a well-rounded adult, nor a full-fledged social being.

A complete adult narcissist is, of course, rare, and he must inevitably be a total misfit in any society. An interesting analogy is offered in the fate of the mythological Narcissus, who becomes so enamored of himself that he spurns the approach of Venus (i. e., the normal sexual relationship), and according to different versions, is killed, or loses his sight, or suffers other symbolic loss of power.

The partial narcissist, however, is common. He is represented by the type of individual whose vanity or egotism is quite out of proportion to what it should be in the case of a social-minded adult human being. Temperamentally and emotionally he is childish.