Why was the first day of Adam's life the longest?—Because it had no Eve.
Why is a washerwoman like a navigator?—Because she spreads her sheets, crosses the line, and goes from pole to pole.
Why is an author the queerest animal in the world?—Because his tale comes out of his head.
Why is it that a tailor won't attend to business?—Because he is always cutting out.
When can a horse be sea-green in color?—When it's a bay.
Why were gloves never meant to sell?—Because they were made to be kept on hand.
When are we all artists?—When we draw a long face.
Why are watch-dogs bigger by night than by day?—Because they are let out at night and taken in in the morning.
When is a tradesman always above his business?—When he lives over his shop.
Which is the liveliest city in the world?—Berlin; because it's always on the Spree.
Why is a water-lily like a whale?—Because they both come to the surface to blow.
Why is a shoemaker the most industrious of men?—Because he works to the last.
What is book-keeping?—Forgetting to return borrowed volumes.
Why is scooping out a turnip a noisy process?—Because it makes it hollow.