Page:Helen Hunt--Ramona.djvu/50

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44
RAMONA.

“Yes, very much indeed,” said the Señora, heartily and with fervor. “She had grieved many years because she had no child.”

Silence again for a brief space, during which the little lonely heart, grappling with its vague instinct of loss and wrong, made wide thrusts into the perplexities hedging it about, and presently electrified the Señora by saying in a half-whisper, “Why did not my father bring me to you first? Did he know you did not want any daughter?”

The Señora was dumb for a second; then recovering herself, she said: “Your father was the Señora Ortegna's friend more than he was mine. I was only a child, then.”

“Of course you did not need any daughter when you had Felipe,” continued Ramona, pursuing her original line of inquiry and reflection without noticing the Señora's reply. “A son is more than a daughter; but most people have both,” eying the Señora keenly, to see what response this would bring.

But the Señora was weary and uncomfortable with the talk. At the very mention of Felipe, a swift flash of consciousness of her inability to love Ramona had swept through her mind. “Ramona,” she said firmly, “while you are a little girl, you cannot understand any of these things. When you are a woman, I will tell you all that I know myself about your father and your mother. It is very little. Your father died when you were only two years old. All that you have to do is to be a good child, and say your prayers, and when Father Salvierderra comes he will be pleased with you. And he will not be pleased if you ask troublesome questions. Don't ever speak to me again about this. When the proper time comes I will tell you myself.”

This was when Ramona was ten. She was now