Page:In defense of Harriet Shelley, and other essays.djvu/108

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MARK TWAIN

"Gentlemen, you have heard the order, and my duty is ended. As to obeying it or not, you will do as you think fit." And he turned to leave.

"But wait. The matter is not yet finished. I think you are mistaken about your duty being ended; but if it really is, I myself have a duty to perform yet."

"How do you mean?"

"Are you going to report my disobedience at headquarters in Pittsburg?"

No. What good would that do ?"

"You must report me, or I will report you."

"Report me for what?"

"For disobeying the company s orders in not stopping this game. As a citizen it is my duty to help the railway companies keep their servants to their work."

"Are you in earnest?"

"Yes, I am in earnest. I have nothing against you as a man, but I have this against you as an officer that you have not carried out that order, and if you do not report me I must report you. And I will."

The conductor looked puzzled, and was thoughtful a moment; then he burst out with:

"I seem to be getting myself into a scrape! It s all a muddle; I can t make head or tail of it; it s never happened before; they always knocked under and never said a word, and so I never saw how ridiculous that stupid order with no penalty is. I don t want to report anybody, and I don t want to be reported why, it might do me no end of harm!

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