Page:Kim - Rudyard Kipling (1912).djvu/352

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320
KIM

I turned hillward, over-persuaded by myself. There is no blame on the hakim. He—following desire—foretold that the hills would make me strong. They strengthened me to do evil, to forget my Search. I delighted in life and the lust of life. I desired strong slopes to climb. I cast about to find them. I measured the strength of my body, which is evil, against the high hills. I made a mock of thee when thy breath came short under Jamnotri. I jested when thou wouldst not face the snow of the pass.'

'But what harm? I was afraid. It was just. I am not a hillman, and I loved thee for thy strength.'

'More than once I remember,' he rested his cheek dolefully on his hand, 'I sought thy praise and the hakim's for the mere strength of my legs. Thus evil followed evil till the cup was full. Just is the Wheel! All Hind for three years did me all honour. From the Fountain of Wisdom in the Wonder House to'—he smiled—'a little child playing by a big gun the world prepared my road. Why?'

'Because we loved thee. It is only the fever of the blow. I myself am still sick and shaken.'

'No. It was because I was upon the Way—turned as are Si-nen (cymbals) to the purpose of the Law. I departed from that ordinance. The tune was broken. Followed the punishment. In my own hills, on the edge of my own country, in the very place of my evil desire, comes the buffet—here!' He touched his brow. 'As a novice is beaten when he misplaces the cups, so am I beaten, who was abbot of Suchzen. No word, look you, but a blow, chela.'

'But the Sahib did not know, Holy One?'

'We were well matched. Ignorance and Lust met Ignorance and Lust upon the road, and they begat Anger. The blow was a sign to me, who am no better than a strayed yak, that my place is