III
“Ladies and gentlemen,” cried Tom, “we are now about to attempt the bold feat of reaching the second floor of the house of the Ranch of the Pointed Firs. Having myself once successfully made the ascent of the architectural Matterhorn leading to that region, I am prepared by that experience to act as your guide. First, allow me to inquire, are you all wearing shoes with hobnails and cleats? Very good. The ladies will need alpenstocks,” handing us each a bed-slat. His glance just then falling upon a coil of rope used during the process of moving, his face lighted with the sudden thought of further absurdity.
“That the exploit upon which we are embarking is a perilous one, I will not deny. To guard against accidents and possible loss of life, it is necessary that we should be firmly bound one to another with this rope. Reverend Chadband, allow me to begin with you,” deftly twining the cord around the waist of Bert, whose clerical title had been suggested by his having recently donned a very old and dilapidated Prince Albert coat.
Our self-constituted guide, having gravely bound us together and tied the rope about his own person, looked us over with gratified pride.
24
