Page:Love's trilogy.djvu/302

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292
'GOD'S PEACE'

292 'GOD'S PEACE'

What matter? Stand where my dream placed you. I do not know you, neither do I want to know you. Let no brutal reality sully your holy image.

25* OF JUNE.

VII •■ I ""O-DAY my letters were forwarded by my J. publisher. Amongst many which were un- important one from my mistress.

She asksj astonished and sad, if earth has swallowed me. In vain she has awaited me and sought me. From a mutual acquaintance she has heard rumours that I have gone abroad with a lady. She now sends her letter out into the blue to my old address, and she writes : ' I don't know if this will reach you. Yet in one way or the other I must know if rumour speaks the truth. I am almost forced to believe it. But have I deserved that you should treat me like this ? What have I done wrong . Have I not always given in to you in everything, done my utmost to behave just as you wished me to, never worried you with importunity and jealousy. Now that you have caused me so bitter a sorrow, I wish I could hate you. But I cannot. Write only two words to say that you will return and I will love you as always.'

She cannot hate me and she imagines she loves me. I don't think that love and hatred necessarily are each other's complement. I feel on the con- trary that the greatest love, how ever sorely it is tortured, never turns into hatred. But she who