Page:Max Havelaar; or, the Coffee Auctions of the Dutch Trading Company (IA dli.granth.77827).pdf/106

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Max Havelaar
87

and more than ever with anything comical or burlesque; a person is made to speak, who does not understand the language, or at least pronounces it badly; a Frenchman is made to speak Dutch thus: “Ka Kaurv na de Krote Krak,” or “Krietje Kooit Keen Kare Kroente Kraakwek.”[1] For want of a Frenchman, a stammerer is selected, or a person “created,” whose hobby consists of two words recurring every moment. I have witnessed the success of a foolish vaudeville, because there was somebody in it who was always saying: “My name is Meyer.” I think this manner of being witty too cheap, and to tell you the truth, I am cross with you, if you think this funny. But now, I have to introduce to you something of that kind myself. I have to show you from time to time a person—I shall do it as seldom as possible—who had, indeed, a manner of speaking which makes me fear to be suspected of an unsuccessful effort to make you laugh; and, therefore, I must assure you that it is not my fault, if the very sedate Resident of Bantam, of whom I am speaking, is so peculiar in his mode of expressing himself, that it is very difficult for me to sketch that, without giving myself the appearance of seeking to produce the effect of wit by means of tic.[2] He spoke as if there stood after each

  1. This is, when rightly spelt: “Ga gaauw naar de groote gracht,” = Go quickly to the great Canal. “Grietje gooit geen gare groete graag weg,” = Gertrude does not like to throw away any cooked vegetables.
  2. Literally translated = convulsive motion.