Page:Memoirs of the Lady Hester Stanhope.djvu/298

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Memoirs of

or two sooner, in answer to her inquiries about the property she thought was left her, would have probably saved all this excitement, he would have found reason to reproach himself for his long silence. I knew the workings of her mind full well, and that her proud spirit, wounded by the general neglect she met with, vented itself in tears, seemingly, for other causes than the real ones. I recollected a succession of similar scenes about twenty years before at Mar Elias, when she was expecting letters from the Duke of Buckingham; but then she was sounder in bodily health, and could better bear such convulsive paroxysms of grief: now, she was labouring under pulmonary disease, was old, was in distress, and the consequences might prove fatal.

I left her before dinner. "Good by, doctor!" she said, in a kind tone: "I cannot tell you how much I am obliged to you for everything you do for me; and send me a servant twice a day to let me know how you are. I shall be uneasy about you: I can't help it: from my childhood I have been so. How many times in my life have I spent days and days in trying to make others comfortable! I have been the slave of others, and never got any thanks for it."

I went to my house, collected all the money that remained, which was about eleven pounds, and sent it to her to meet the current expenses of the household: