Page:Moll Flanders (1906 edition).djvu/248

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216
THE LIFE OF ROXANA

'No, madam; but I would really have you do so. Besides, you are undone if you do not; and, if my doing it would save you from being undone, as I said before, he shall, if he will; if he asks me, I won't deny him, not I; hang me if I do', says Amy.

'Well, I know not what to do', says I to Amy.

'Do!' says Amy. 'Your choice is fair and plain. Here you may have a handsome, charming gentleman, be rich, live pleasantly and in plenty, or refuse him, and want a dinner, go in rags, live in tears; in short, beg and starve. You know this is the case, madam', says Amy. 'I wonder how you can say you know not what to do.'

'Well, Amy', says I, 'the case is as you say, and I think verily I must yield to him; but then', said I, moved by conscience, 'don't talk any more of your cant of its being lawful that I ought to marry again, and that he ought to marry again, and such stuff as that; 'tis all nonsense', says I, 'Amy, there's nothing in it; let me hear no more of that, for, if I yield, 'tis in vain to mince the matter, I am a whore, Amy; neither better nor worse, I assure you.'

'I don't think so, madam, by no means', says Amy. 'I wonder how you can talk so'; and then she run on with her argument of the unreasonableness that a woman should be obliged to live single, or a man to live single, in such cases as before. Well, Amy', said I, 'come, let us dispute no more, for the longer I enter into that part, the greater my scruples will be; but, if I let it alone, the necessity of my present circumstances is such that I believe I shall yield to him, if he should importune me much about it; but I should be glad he would not do it at all, but leave me as I am.'

'As to that, madam, you may depend', says Amy, 'he expects to have you for his bedfellow to-night. I saw it plainly in his management all day; and at last he told you so too, as plain, I think, as he could.' 'Well, well, Amy', said I, 'I don't know what to say; if he will, he must, I think; I don't know how to resist such a man, that has done so much for me.' 'I don't know how you should', says Amy.

Thus Amy and I canvassed the business between us; the jade prompted the crime which I had but too much inclination to commit, that is to say, not as a crime, for I had nothing of the vice in my constitution; my spirits were far from being high, my blood had no fire in it to kindle the flame of desire; but the kindness and good humour of the man and the dread of my own circumstances concurred to bring me to the point, and I even resolved, before he asked, to give up my virtue to him whenever he should put it to the question.

In this I was a double offender, whatever he was, for I was resolved to commit the crime, knowing and owning it to be a crime; he, if it was true as he said, was fully persuaded it was lawful, and in that persuasion he took the measures and used all the circumlocutions which I am going to speak of.

About two hours after he was gone, came a Leadenhall basket-woman, with a whole load of good things for the mouth (the particulars are not to the purpose), and brought orders to get supper by eight o'clock. How ever, I did not intend to begin to dress anything till I saw him; and he gave me time enough, for he came before seven, so that Amy, who had gotten one to help her, got everything ready in time.

We sat down to supper about eight, and were indeed very merry. Amy