which sometimes, indeed, pleasantly occupy my thoughts. But by my own will I yet hope soon to succeed in freeing myself absolutely from them. Should I ever become weak again, the ideas you have impressed on me would, I am sure, make an energetic resistance, and I should not succumb.”
On October 20, 1890, P. wrote me: “I am completely cured of onanism, and I have no pleasure in male-love. Yet complete virility does not seem to have been re-established, notwithstanding the fact that I lead a virtuous life. Nevertheless, I feel satisfied.”
Case 136. Acquired Contrary Sexual Instinct.—Mr. Z., aged 32, divorced. He comes of a hysteropathic mother. Maternal grandmother suffered with hysteria, and her brothers and sisters were neurotic. One brother is an urning. Z. was but poorly endowed mentally, and did not learn easily. No sickness besides scarlatina. When thirteen, he was taught to masturbate by companions in a school. Sexually, he was hyperæsthetic, and, at seventeen, began to indulge in coitus, with full pleasure and power. For reasons of position and money, he married at twenty-six. The marriage was very unhappy. After a year Mrs. Z. became incapable of coitus, by reason of uterine disease. Z. satisfied his. inordinate desires with other women, faute de mieux, by masturbation. Besides, he gave himself up to play, led an absolutely dissolute life, became exceedingly neurasthenic, and sought to strengthen his weakened nerves by drinking great quantities of wine and brandy. To his essential cerebral asthenia were added peripheral alcoholic cramps and globus, and he became very emotional. His libido nimia continued unabated. On account of his disgust of prostitutes and fear of infection, satisfaction by coitus was exceptional: For the most part, the patient helped himself with onanism.
Four years ago he noticed weakening of erection and decrease of libido for women. He began to feel himself drawn toward men, and his lascivious dreams were no longer concerned with women, but with men.
Three years ago, while being rubbed by a bath-attendant, he became powerfully excited sexually (the attendant also had an erection, to patient’s surprise). He could not keep from embracing and kissing the attendant, and allowing him to perform masturbation on him, the attendant doing it most willingly. From this time this mode of sexual indulgence was all that he cared for. Women became a matter of entire indifference to him; he devoted himself exclusively to men. With them he practiced mutual masturbation, and had a longing to sleep with them. He abhorred pederasty. He was entirely satisfied until (August, 1890) an anonymous letter, warning him to be careful, brought him to his senses. He was much frightened, had hysterical attacks, and became much depressed. He was embarrassed before men, seemed like a pariah in society, contemplated suicide, and finally confessed to a priest, who comforted him. He now fell into a religious state (equivalent), and, out