THE PATRIOTIC BURGLAR.
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I. The above professional criminal who recently broke into a house and stole a silver mustard-pot and a couple of spoons———
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II. ———saw his act described in the paper next day as "a particularly mean and cowardly one, the occupier of the house being absent serving his country." When it was put to him like that———
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III. ———he determined to make restitution. He could not return the identical articles he had taken. Alas! they were already melted. So he broke into another house, ascertaining first that the occupier was not serving his country———
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IV. ———and then rebroke into the first house (silencing the cook who had been left in charge and was inclined to raise an alarm) and placed there the results of the second burglary. After that he felt much better, and could look patriots in the face.
