Page:Ragged Trousered Philanthropists.djvu/335

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The Beano


'Such talk as that is not likely to deceive any but children or fools. We are not children, but it is very evident that Mr Grinder thinks we are fools.

'At the same time it is quite true that the real interests of employers and workmen are the same, but not in the sense that Mr Grinder would have us believe. Under the existing system of society only very few people, no matter how wealthy they are, can be absolutely certain that they or their children will not eventually come to want, and even those who think they are secure themselves find their happiness diminished by the knowledge of the poverty and misery that surrounds them on every side.

'In that sense only is it true that the interests of masters and men are identical, for it is to the true interest of all, both 'rich and poor, to help to destroy a system that inflicts suffering upon the many and allows true happiness to none.'

Here Crass jumped up and interrupted, shouting out that they hadn't come there to listen to a lot of speechmaking, a remark that was greeted with unbounded applause by most of those present. Loud cries of 'Hear, hear!' resounded through the room, and the Semi-Drunk suggested that someone should sing a song.

The men who had clamoured for a speech from Owen said nothing, and Mr Grinder seemed very glad of the interruption.

The Semi-Drunk's suggestion that someone should sing a song was received with unqualified approbation by everybody. The landlord's daughter sat down at the piano, and the Semi-Drunk, taking his place at the side of the instrument and facing the audience, sang 'Down at the old Bull and Bush' with appropriate gestures, the chorus being rendered by the full strength of the company, including Misery, who by this time was slightly drunk with gin and ginger beer.

Crass next approached the piano and gave them 'Work Boys Work!', at the end of which three cheers were given for Tariff Reform and 'Plenty of Work.' Then Philpot was called upon to oblige, and received a great ovation when he stood up. Everybody liked Philpot, ''E never did no 'arm to nobody,' and was always ready to do a mate a good turn, and shouts of 'good old Joe!' were enthusiastically raised as he crossed over to the piano, and, in response to numerous requests for 'the old song,' gave them 'Won't you buy my pretty Flowers?'.

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